This week Disney opened its first ever theme park in China. More than ten thousand children showed up on opening day. And… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
President Bush got an early Christmas gift. This week, President Bush was chosen as 'Person of the Year' by Time magazine. Not… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Donald Trump announced today he is running for president of the United States. Traditionally that means six more weeks of comedy. — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
The Olive Garden is bringing back its 'Pasta Pass,' which lets you eat as much pasta as you want for seven weeks.… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
In the press this week, NBC has been calling me every name in the book. In fact, they think I'm such an… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Earlier this week - this is crazy - the country's first marijuana cafe opened up, which not only sells medical marijuana, but… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
This week Apple stores are holding free computer programming classes for children. Or as that's called in China, a job fair. — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
The results of a new study are out this week saying that New Jersey is one of the most livable states in… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
There is some good news for John McCain. According to the latest polls, which came out today, John McCain has started to… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Jeb Bush is getting his presidential campaign in gear. Last week he said he supports a path to citizenship for immigrants. He… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
The big story is Bruce Jenner. In last week's interview, Jenner said he's a woman who is transitioning his body from male… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
The three auto companies in the United States, they're all scrambling to come up with a plan, some way to reinvent themselves.… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Arnold Schwarzenegger is in trouble after tapes surfaced of him saying negative things about other Republicans. Actually the Schwarzenegger tapes surfaced last… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Despite the Brian Williams lying scandal, NBC News led in the ratings last week. Although I should note the figures were reported… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
The Northeast is being hit with a major snowstorm. Forecasters said they've haven't seen a whiteout like this since last week's Oscar… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
The Senate has sent President Obama a spending bill that gives the government enough money to keep going for two weeks. Our… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
This week a group of activists, known as Anonymous, hacked the Twitter account of the KKK. The KKK is furious. They said… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
The British government has urged its citizens to abstain from alcohol at least two days a week. Or to make it easier… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Over the weekend, former Enron executives Jeffrey Skilling and Rebecca Carter married each other during a huge ceremony in Houston. The happy… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
'Shrek 2' made over $120 million during its first week. In a related story, John Kerry asked Shrek to marry him. — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
A federal court has ruled that the U.S. Postal Service must reduce its stamp prices. The change in stamp prices is expected to affect… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
NBC is making a movie about Martha Stewart that will cover the recent stock scandal. They are thinking of calling it 'The Road To… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
People should say 'no comment' more often. No comment! I love no comment. Let's have more no comment. — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
A new study reveals that one-third of babies in the U.S. have used a smartphone. Yeah, and one-third of babies in China have MADE… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Martha Stewart showed up at Manhattan FBI Headquarters to have her finger prints taken and pose for a mug shot. Then Martha explained how… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
The big story today, Barack Obama was accused of insulting Sarah Palin when he criticized Republican policies by saying, you can put lipstick on… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
LEGO has announced that they are shutting down their U.S. factory and moving it to Canada. LEGO employees say it's their fault because they… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
A new survey reveals that women would rather give up sex than give up the remote control for the TV. Men, on the other… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Yesterday the DEA raided several NFL teams suspected of giving prescription painkillers to their players. In its defense, the New York Jets' doctor said,… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
President Obama gave a speech about healthcare tonight, and yesterday he gave a pep talk to students. He told them that in order to… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
The first thing men notice about a woman is her eyes. Then, when her eyes aren't looking, they notice her breasts. — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
“Disappointment leads to clarity, which leads to conviction and true originality.” — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
