Relationships are like plants; I always accidentally kill them. — Nikhil Saluja Kill Copy Share Image
Every maternity ward is just a Facebook wall post factory. — Nikhil Saluja Maternity Copy Share Image
People get so weird when you put your fingers in their nose. — Nikhil Saluja Facebook Copy Share Image
Took a compatibility test and the results said I get along best with beer. — Nikhil Saluja Beer Copy Share Image
A Woman Never Say: I liked that wedding even more then ours. Your ex-girlfriend has class. — Nikhil Saluja Ex girlfriend Copy Share Image
I wonder how many people I would have actually murdered brutally if everything I thought actually happened. — Nikhil Saluja Murdered Copy Share Image
Never use wet wood in your fireplace. Always let weeping logs dry. — Nikhil Saluja Facebook Copy Share Image
If you haven't checked the time in your watch for like 4 or 5 hours, you're probably having a good time. — Nikhil Saluja Good time Copy Share Image
The cobra will bite you whether you call it cobra or Sir. Cobra. — Nikhil Saluja Cobra Copy Share Image
I wouldn't mind being in an abusive relationship with you babes only if you would punch me with her tits. — Nikhil Saluja Abusive Copy Share Image
I will always ignore a woman's feelings unless, those feelings involve me feeling her titties. — Nikhil Saluja Feeling Titties Copy Share Image
Well, let's just call them, uh, Mr. X and Mrs. Y. So anyway, Mr. X would say, 'Marge, if this doesn't get… — Nikhil Saluja Facebook Copy Share Image
5% of all hearing loss is a result of sitting in a restaurant next to a table full of women who just… — Nikhil Saluja Facebook Copy Share Image
Doctor, Doctor you've taken out my tonsils, my adenoids, my gall bladder, my varicose veins and my appendix, but I still don't… — Nikhil Saluja Doctor Copy Share Image
I followed you on TWITTER because I'm secretly in love with you and I'm hoping this will help you realize that you… — Nikhil Saluja Love Copy Share Image
If mom was here she would be subtweeting all over the place stuff like : who's gonna buy groceries : who's gonna… — Nikhil Saluja Facebook Copy Share Image
LOVE, A temporary insanity curable by marriage or the removing of the patient from the influences under which he or she incurred… — Nikhil Saluja Being cool Copy Share Image
They say childbirth is the most pain women ever experience. Mothers prepare their daughters for this pain by brushing their hair. — Nikhil Saluja Childbirth Copy Share Image
Smoking one cigarette shortens your life by 14 minutes, but having sex lengthens it by 12 minutes. So smokers: screw for your lives! — Nikhil Saluja Cigarette Copy Share Image
INFATUATION, A wasting disease easily cured -- by marriage — Nikhil Saluja Being cool Copy Share Image
