“Says O'Sullivan to me, "Mr. Fay, I'll have a word wid yeh?" "Certainly," says I; "what can I do for you?" "Sell… — Jack London Copy Share Image
“You’re so full of shit, if you ever had an enema you’d evaporate into thin air.” — Catherine Doyle Copy Share Image
I'm afraid everything I was is gone and all that's left is everything I'm not. — Courtney Summers Copy Share Image
I want a girl in whose eyes I can see the whole world..i really want to see france — Shubham Joshi Copy Share Image
A member of the committee slapped a name tag over my left bosom. "What shall we name the other one?" I smiled.… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
“Be a Samurai. Because you just never know what's behind the freaking sky.” — Laini Taylor Copy Share Image
You know you're addicted to Call of Duty when you go to work, take your boss's suitcase, make beeping sounds, and then… — Alec Straub Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when your making a stupid face & your crush looks right at you — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Woman are carzy. Men are stupid. Women are crazy because men are stupid. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
A wise man once told me, no matter how HOT she is, somebody somewhere is sick of her. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
They have a lot of trouble with pronunciation, because they can't move their jaw muscles, because of malnutrition caused by wisely refusing… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Children really brighten up a household. They never turn the lights off. — Ralph Bus Copy Share Image
“Felicia (to Grayson) - To think Eliza truly does seem to be under the misimpression that you're capable of charm.” — Jen Turano Copy Share Image
One funny thing is, though, I wear my watch on my right hand and I'm actually right-handed. People always wonder why -… — Luke Evans Copy Share Image
Be the kind of woman that, when your feet hit the floor every morning, the devil says, 'Oh, crap. She's up.' — Anonymous Copy Share Image
In my experience, you run into trouble when you ask a group of beer-drinking men to perform any task more complex than… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
A casino in South Dakota was robbed by a man dressed as a mummy. The police described the suspect as anywhere between… — Craig Ferguson Copy Share Image
All I want for Fathers Day is a woman who'll help me reenact the activities that led to my becoming a father… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If ur world is spinning around and ur heart is beating fast.. Do u think its love? ? ? ? No no… — Curly_girl Copy Share Image
Hansie Cronje. Honestly. I got out to Hansie more than anyone.I never knew what to do with him — Sachin Tendulkar Copy Share Image
When I hear somebody like Hayes Carll write a song that's touching and poignant and sad and funny all at the same… — Jason Isbell Copy Share Image
I really loved making my mom laugh, and I knew that she thought that I was funny. It was really valuable, in… — Katherine Ryan Copy Share Image
