“Hey. Hands off.”, “Please. Please, please, soooo pretty. Lemme just have one little touch.” “Peabody, isn’t it embarrassing enough you’re wearing pink… — J.D. Robb Copy Share Image
Like, your body has to get used to being in front of people. Like - and you have to be like -… — Neal Brennan Copy Share Image
“...he said...Do you understand?" "Yes," she said, heart pounding. "Thank you for explaining it in simple terms, in case my girl brain… — Loretta Chase Copy Share Image
“King John won't need any persuading that the French have a hand in this. From what I've heard, if a bean gives… — Karen Maitland Copy Share Image
I think that you take the path of least resistance. And for a lot of people comedy is that path. I mean,… — Kevin Grevioux Copy Share Image
“There are certain things in life that just suck. Pouring a big bowl of Lucky Charms before realizing the milk is expired,… — Lauren Morrill Copy Share Image
“Birds that cannot fly high into the sky rejoice exceedingly and sing sweet melodies when they get to the top of the… — Ernest Agyemang Yeboah Copy Share Image
“Victor patted my hand. 'I like you, Sky. You're a fighter.' 'I am, aren't I? Hear that, Zed? No more bambi comparisons.… — Joss Stirling Copy Share Image
“I know that having a good vocabulary doesn't guarantee that I'm a good person, but it does mean I've read a great… — Lemony Snicket Copy Share Image
“He is teaching them to eat those seeds,” she said through clenched teeth, “out of Raina and Berdine’s hands. The two of… — Terry Goodkind Copy Share Image
As far as standup, everybody has a vehicle they are driving. If what you do works, it's like playing golf. If you… — J. B. Smoove Copy Share Image
I kind of knew inside that I wanted to try comedy, but it was a mystery. How do you start? So when… — Lisa Lampanelli Copy Share Image
“The USPS is the only place in the world where you will find a black guy, a white guy, and a hispanic… — Rhoda D'Ettore Copy Share Image
If you're dating a man who you think might be "Mr. Right," if he a) got older, b) got a new job,… — Rita Rudner Copy Share Image
I love doing comedy. But sometimes, that exists at sort of the mid-level to the high-comedy level of craziness, and I don't… — Janet Varney Copy Share Image
“His words thrummed in, deep, imprinting themselves on her very deepest, deepest, deep bits. “I believe I am your destiny. You are… — Cari Silverwood Copy Share Image
A pitfall of making a comedy with a studio-and it's also an American cultural thing-is that I get tired of being encouraged… — Alexander Payne Copy Share Image
It is curious for one who studies the action and reaction of national literature on each other, to see the humor of… — James Russell Lowell Copy Share Image
I don't really watch dramas. I prefer watching comedy. Also, when you're in comedy, watching 'Community' or 'Larry Sanders' feels like research,… — Tom Rosenthal Copy Share Image
“I mean, it's not even been a two-and-two-make five sort of a day, it's more like a two-and-to-make... fish... or something... You… — Dave McKean Copy Share Image
“In the novels, it always seemed best to keep the suspect talking. Inevitably, help would arrive. I really held out no hope… — Ashley Weaver Copy Share Image
“You never say what I wish you’d say, and you frequently say nothing at all when it’s clear you should say something,… — Lindsay Buroker Copy Share Image
“Take a look at my face. Do you see my expression? Does it scare you? It should, because this is the expression… — Katie MacAlister Copy Share Image
I always say, if I tell you a joke right now and it's funny, you laugh. Now, we set the lights, and… — Martin Landau Copy Share Image
“How above-the-law children's books are. Hansel and Gretel (littering, breaking and entering), Rumpelstiltskin (forced labor), Snow White (conspiracy to commit murder), Rapunzel… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share Image
“At the first time, I do my best to try again against the inevitable tragedy. In the second time, I become disgusted… — Fredrica Bernkastel Copy Share Image
“Patch’s mouth turned grim. “Actually, I don’t like the sound of that.” “If it’s any consolation, I can’t stand Dante. Don’t sweat… — Becca Fitzpatrick Copy Share Image
“I had a dream about you. You sold canned laughter, and I sold fresh laughter, straight out of my throat. You sold… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“On my way to the parking lot, in quick succession, I saw students wearing t-shirts which read, “Save the whales. Collect the… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If you're gonna tell a story from beginning to end, I always think you have to have a great structure in a… — Sandra Bullock Copy Share Image
“His expression changed, and he took a step back. He looked away. "When you said it was broken , you were just… — Brigid Kemmerer Copy Share Image
Comedy can be silly and gross and offensive, as long as there's sort of a point. You can make a joke that,… — Steve Coogan Copy Share Image
When I was a younger guy doing comedy, it was a big struggle. Promoters canceled me out of clubs left and right… — Don Rickles Copy Share Image
I came to the conclusion that in comedy, everybody gets what they need, whereas in horror, everybody gets what they deserve. I… — Neil Gaiman Copy Share Image
“You think Tide is better, or All?' 'Which has a prettier box?' I ask. 'I don't want a pretty box. I want… — E. Lockhart Copy Share Image
So, I sit at the hotel at night and I think of something that's funny. Or, If the pen is too far… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
The movie [ The Innkeepers] is in no way a comedy, but I would put some of the funny scenes up against… — Ti West Copy Share Image
“I was seriously not cut out for undercover work - which was pretty damn obvious, judging by the fact that I was… — Alexa Land Copy Share Image
You know those things that you throw the twigs into and it spits them out? That's what I do. The branches are… — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
Working on newspapers, you're writing to a certain length, often very brief pieces; you tend to look for easy forms of humor… — Tom Wolfe Copy Share Image