“I guess I might be bi-curious," Ben said quietly." "What?" "I said I could be sorta bi-curious," Ben said loudly. "That's someone… — Eli Easton Copy Share Image
“I tried to go to sleep with my headphones still on, but then after a while my mom and dad came in,… — John Green Copy Share Image
“There is a funny story I always tell my students...when I came for the first time to the US. I didn’t speak… — Pablo Copy Share Image
“When faced with difficulties, a humble, understanding, appreciative and selfless person finds it easy to win a friend. On the other hand,… — Janvier Chouteu-Chando Copy Share Image
“Poor boys are easier than middle-class or rich ones. Boys who've been busted are easier than boys who have not. Southern boys… — John Valentine Copy Share Image
As far as best comedy show, Richard Prior live. The Long Beach show. That's the apex, that's the pinnacle. That's what everybody's… — Eddie Griffin Copy Share Image
“I thought you were makin’ small talk about the weather.” “When have I ever made small talk with you?” “When we first… — Ann Charles Copy Share Image
I think people who work in comedy and humor are hesitant to analyze it too much, because you feel like if you… — Matt Groening Copy Share Image
“Reseph had never been cruel or callous, had lived in fear of succumbing to his evil side. And if he was that… — Larissa Ione Copy Share Image
“A tip for increased sales or in situations of life or death: Try to always refer to the lady as Miss. or… — Ginnetta Correli Copy Share Image
“As a comedian, the more you commit the sin of stupidity, three essential things happen to your life: ~people applaud you incessantly.… — Michael Bassey Johnson Copy Share Image
“I tried to lighten the mood, and pointed at the house shoes - the last things I'd have expected to see Catcher… — Chloe Neill Copy Share Image
“You're right [Joshua], I have taught you nothing. I could teach you nothing. Everything that you needed to know was already there.… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“The night in question, I had put aside my perpetual lavatory read, The Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire , because… — David Mitchell Copy Share Image
“Republicans: 'we fought the good fight' - yeah, it woulda been worth it if we could have prevented just one poor kid… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
I make myself a bowl of instant oatmeal, and then I don't do anything for an hour. Why do I need the… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
“His books commingled democratically, united under the all-inclusive flag of Literature. Some were vertical, some horizontal, and some actually placed behind others.… — Anne Fadiman Copy Share Image
“It is worth noting that at this time, I had been doing Weekend Update on Saturday Night Live for two full seasons.… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
“I asked you here today because the police department asked me to assess your mental health." I huffed and rolled my eyes.… — Devon Ashley Copy Share Image
“Mizzenmast,” bellowed Caldris, and Locke and Jean both fetched up short, breathing heavily. “Ship doesn’t bloody have one,” said Locke. “Just foremast… — Scott Lynch Copy Share Image
“Jace rolled his eyes. “It’s fascinating,” he said. “You know all these words, and they’re all English, but when you string them… — Cassandra Clare Copy Share Image
A sign now of success with a certain audience when you do a short comedy piece, anywhere, is that it gets on… — Andy Samberg Copy Share Image
~I use humor instead of getting into that whole yes and no thing all the time. It's about just getting them to… — Marcia Cross Copy Share Image
“Perfect,” he groaned. “You are perfect.” He sank his teeth into her ass, hard, drawing blood. “And now you wear my mark,”… — Hanna Lui Copy Share Image
“After you are here, I will try not to become one of those parents who brag incessantly about their children, who force… — Suzanne Finnamore Copy Share Image
My dad's sense of humor was direct and sometimes surreal - his quick wit is well known amongst our family and friends.… — Tony Visconti Copy Share Image
“You have the most infernal habit when anyone says the simplest thing to you, of letting your lower jaw drop and looking… — PG Wodehouse Copy Share Image
I can pretty much guarantee that if I do a show in a comedy club, there will be someone who will come… — Lewis Black Copy Share Image
The stuff that's going on is just so over-the-top, with the banking crisis and destroying the Gulf of Mexico, and the outrage… — Adam McKay Copy Share Image
I really love writing comedy. Writing romantic comedy is even nicer because you get to write about how insane we all act… — Pearl Cleage Copy Share Image
A clever conjurer is welcome anywhere, and those of us whose powers of entertainment are limited to the setting of booby-traps or… — A. A. Milne Copy Share Image
The two real political parties in America are the Winners and the Losers. The people don't acknowledge this. They claim membership in… — Kurt Vonnegut Copy Share Image
“Sorry. Bad joke. I didn't know things were serious between you." "I never said they were serious." Phillip laughed, then winced as… — Nora Roberts Copy Share Image
“So, anyway." Jackal's impatient voice broke through our cold standoff. "Not to interrupt this riveting family drama, but are we going to… — Julie Kagawa Copy Share Image
Opening your cabinet, seeing there's no snacks! Opening Refrigerator nothing there either Then right after that, you go back to the cabinet… — Hugo Campos Copy Share Image
"Black culture" is ready for whatever. I sense some momentum and excitement around black artists (especially in comedy, which is where most… — Baratunde Thurston Copy Share Image
“Once I understood what was making America such a dangerous, unhappy nation of people who had nothing to do with real life,… — Kurt Vonnegut Copy Share Image
“Who cares even if I didn't?!" Conor shouted back. "They're just stupid berries. Woo-hoo, so scary . Oh, please, please, save me… — Patrick Ness Copy Share Image
I went to see Chris Rock on Saturday night here in Atlanta, and he made a statement in his comedy. He said,… — Michael Eric Dyson Copy Share Image
“Every gay man should be familiar with Bert and Ernie." "And why is that?" Reece rolled his eyes, smiling. "Everyone knows that… — L.A. Gilbert Copy Share Image
![“You're right [Joshua], I have taught you nothing. I could teach you nothing. Everything that you needed to know was already there. You simply needed the word for it. Some need Kali and Shiva to destroy the world so they may see past the illusion to divinity in them, others need Krishna to drive…” quote by Christopher Moore](https://sms4smile.com/q/i/690/christopher-moore-353_buddhism_you-re-right-joshua-i-have-taught-you-no_314308.jpg)
