Matt Groening

“You watched it! You can't unwatch it!”

— Matt Groening

Welcome to Suckersville, man.

— Matt Groening

Being a good embalmer is a thankless job.

— Matt Groening

Think beer; drink beer.

— Matt Groening

I'm a writer who just happens to draw

— Matt Groening

Don't have a cow, man.

— Matt Groening

God often gives nuts to toothless people.

— Matt Groening

Everybody is clever, just in their own ways

— Matt Groening

First you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women.

— Matt Groening

“You see, Marriage is like a Coffin, and each Kid is another Nail.”

— Matt Groening

Vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and eskimos.

— Matt Groening

This doesn't happen in America! Maybe Ohio, but not in America!" Homer Simpson

— Matt Groening

“To alcohol! The cause of... and solution to... all of life's problems”

— Matt Groening

Families are about love overcoming emotional torture. - Maker of the Simpsons

— Matt Groening

“One year later, I got beat up at a Neil Diamond concert by a guy named Scrunchie!”

— Matt Groening

I want it to go on, but I want us to go out on top.

— Matt Groening

For some reason, a lot of Hollywood big shots are curious to see how they'd be drawn with bulging eyes and no…

— Matt Groening

Everybody doesn't have to get every joke. People really appreciate not being condescended to.

— Matt Groening

When the authorities warn you of the dangers of having sex, there is an important lesson to be learned. Do not have…

— Matt Groening

I think when 'The Simpsons' first came on, there was an uproar. People got used to it. They realized the show's really…

— Matt Groening

Today is the first day of the rest of your short, brutish existence as a sentient creature before being snuffed out into…

— Matt Groening

Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels…

— Matt Groening

I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me, Superman. Homer Simpson

— Matt Groening

The tendency in comedy is to have a character who's stupid get more stupid, because you're trying to top yourself and not…

— Matt Groening

When The Simpsons came around, there really was nothing else like it on TV. It's hard to imagine, but when Fox first…

— Matt Groening

I've been deadline-driven for my whole grown-up life, and that hasn't gone away. It is nice to be able to reflect about…

— Matt Groening

I have to say that The Simpsons comes from a huge number of great writers headed by Al Jean, the show-runner, and…

— Matt Groening

I always thought that television was the way to go in my goal to invade pop culture because it got to towns…

— Matt Groening

'The Simpsons' basically - and 'Futurama' - are really smart shows. They're kind of disguised as these goofy animated sitcoms, but the…

— Matt Groening

With Charlie Brown, it was about loneliness and isolation. I always thought that the thing about Charlie Brown and those characters was…

— Matt Groening

Back in high school, I wrote a novel about a character named Bart Simpson. I thought it was a very unusual name…

— Matt Groening

Your cable television is experiencing difficulties. Please do not panic. Resist the temptation to read or talk to loved ones. Do not…

— Matt Groening

I think in daily newspapers, the way comic strips are treated, it's as if newspaper publishers are going out of their way…

— Matt Groening

Where do babies come from? Don't bother asking adults. They lie like pigs. However, diligent independent research and hours of playground consultation…

— Matt Groening

The Simpsons and Futurama are such big projects, going on for years and working in different media, that everything involved with them,…

— Matt Groening

The next time you are contemplating a decision in which you are debating whether or not to go for the gusto, ask…

— Matt Groening

American culture has a lot of great moustaches in its history. Mark Twain had a great moustache, Charlie Chaplin, Ben Turpin ...…

— Matt Groening

You know, I've been thinking. Everyone makes peanut butter and jelly sandwiches but usually the jelly drips out all over the side…

— Matt Groening

“What I’ve noticed in a lot of other cartoonists is a sullen resentfulness about their lack of attention and tiny checking accounts.…

— Matt Groening

Me fail english? Thats unpossible.

— Matt Groening