“As with most of life's problems, this one can be solved by a box of pure radiation.” — Andy Weir Copy Share Image
“Thank God (my wife) and I were both born poor so the concept of fidelity was allowed to take root in us.” — Allan Wolf Copy Share Image
Actors are a great subject for a comedy. They're inherently funny because, like sportsmen, they take themselves so seriously. — Matt Berry Copy Share Image
They say if you outlaw guns, only outlaws will have guns. Well, those are precisely the people who need them! — George Carlin Copy Share Image
“There's no perk in being closed-minded as a minority. It's never, ever, ever going to help you, ever.” — Baratunde R. Thurston Copy Share Image
It's so much fun to be around someone who enjoys life...someone who can find humor in almost any situation and who brings… — Nishan Panwar Copy Share Image
“What are we doing, burying bodies?" Admittedly, this would be a lace to do it. Isolated, off any main roads. "Nope. We're… — Kelley York Copy Share Image
“If Jeff wished to pursue the matter he'd have to leave his beer, and I felt intuitively that he would never do… — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
When you go to a restaurant, sometimes you want to go to Heston Blumenthal's where you hear the sound of the sea… — Aisling Bea Copy Share Image
People have expectations from you - and the whole fun of acting is taking expectations and completely upending them. That's how you… — John Lithgow Copy Share Image
I think that what comes through in Chicago humor is the affection. Even though youre poking fun at someone or something, theres… — Bob Newhart Copy Share Image
I'm a goofball, so I think comedy is one of my stronger points, as an actor. I just never get to do… — Tinsel Korey Copy Share Image
“Does it stand, but not straight enough? Is there a bend in the tool? Leaning left like the Marxist-Leninist Party? To the… — Rohinton Mistry Copy Share Image
“The Holy Mother has many faces, but you know it's her from her blue cloak. She is said to be the spirit… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“I know lots of things you don't" "Name five." "The Grand Unification Theory, tax law, binary, the capital of Azerbailan, and how… — Daniel Nayeri Copy Share Image
If you ever get in real trouble, don't panic. Sit down and think about it. Remember two things, always. There must be… — Louise Fitzhugh Copy Share Image
