It is awfully hard work doing nothing. However, I don't mind hard work where there is no definite object of any kind.… — Oscar Wilde Copy Share Image
“The fact that pigs were abroad in the night seemed to bring home to me the perilous nature of my enterprise.” — P.G. Wodehouse Copy Share Image
“ Rhett: If you've made up your mind to impale someone, do it with conviction.” — Rowena Cherry Copy Share Image
The one and only thing over which you have complete and total control is how you focus your own mind. Luckily, this… — Napoleon Hill Copy Share Image
Frequent and loud laughter is the characteristic of folly and ill manners. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Demons, werewolves, zombies--they're all supposed to be for entertainment purposes only.” — Jen Naumann Copy Share Image
“I often don't know where my Luggage is, that's what being a tourist is all about.” — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Anger is like sex urge, once gratified, the inner voice calls you a stinking fool.” — Michael Bassey Johnson Copy Share Image
“Okay, Jen, he could fuck you with that voice alone and you’re Squeaky McSqueakerson? Let’s try for a little more on the… — Katie Allen Copy Share Image
“All faults or defects, from the slightest misconduct to the most flagitious crime, Pantocyclus attributed to some deviation from perfect Regularity in… — Edwin A. Abbott Copy Share Image
But, through the shift of mood and mood, Mine ancient humor saves him whole The cynic devil in his blood That bids… — Rudyard Kipling Copy Share Image
Any philosophical and theoretical assurance that laughter is unique to the human being becomes somewhat unsure when one turns to the anthropological… — Simon Critchley Copy Share Image
“If it had been my decision, you would still be sleeping, and I would be hoping every hour of every night you… — Seanan McGuire Copy Share Image
I'm looking for laughs, you know? If it take me to flip over a table, if I have to go physical comedy,… — Bernie Mac Copy Share Image
“Any chance I’d get to see you in that bikini?” Zahara punched him in the arm. “No more talk of me in… — Annabell Cadiz Copy Share Image
PROBOSCIS, n. The rudimentary organ of an elephant which serves him in place of the knife-and-fork that Evolution has as yet denied… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
“ Rhett: Here’s the problem. I am not the sexual equivalent of an espresso machine. ” — Rowena Cherry Copy Share Image
That's what I love about sketch comedy: a sketch is five minutes, then it goes dark, and there's the potential for something… — Jason Sudeikis Copy Share Image
“All charming people are spoiled. It is the secret of their attraction.” — Oscar Wilde Copy Share Image
“Being holed up in here does wonders for making the brain do what it was made for.” — James Dashner Copy Share Image
“It’s a sad state of affairs when I’m the one bringing sanity to the equation” — M.A. George Copy Share Image
Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If these two are tired of having sex with each other, what hope is there for the rest of us? — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
“Let's not have forced gaiety this Christmas, said Nora, like it was a dish. We'll have a tiny bit of it, I… — Miriam Toews Copy Share Image
“If you are fully conscious of your bad decisions, but are still trying to blame your parents, you are an idiot!” — Sara strong Copy Share Image
“Don't talk to me like that! I am your mother! Oh, God the Father, I have raised a monster!” — Carlos Malvar Copy Share Image
He that cometh to seek after knowledge, with a mind to scorn, shall be sure to find matter for his humour, but… — Francis Bacon Copy Share Image
If 'Sajjan Singh Rangroot' showed seriousness through the First World War, 'Carry On Jatta 2' had a great dose of comedy. — Varun Sharma Copy Share Image
“What'd you think would happen when you died? That the prophecy would just be over and we'd all be like, oops, guess… — H.M. Ward Copy Share Image
Does anyone else think mirrors look unbelievably handsome or is it just me? — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Some people are so positive, that when they slip in dog poop, they pirouette” — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
“Men are linear creatures, led by their lusts. You only have to give them an excuse to act on what they already… — Nancy Gideon Copy Share Image
I'm a vegetarian, I'm not strict. I eat fish. And duck, but they're nearly fish aren't they. — Bill Bailey Copy Share Image
“You can make heaven out of hell, or hell out of heaven. The choice is yours.” — Shannon L. Alder Copy Share Image
“It’s a funny old world, isn’t it? Just when you think you know someone, just when you think you know yourself…” — Harlem Dae Copy Share Image
I've done so many dramas in my life, and people don't even know I came from comedy. — Kim Basinger Copy Share Image
Because the rhymes I say, sharp as a nail. Witty as can be and not for sale. Always funky fresh, could NEVER… — Run DMC Copy Share Image
“Theodore- Hello, Grandmother. You're looking more beautiful than ever. His grandma- You did have to inherit your looks from someone.” — Jen Turano Copy Share Image
“You're never "keeping it real" with your lack of punctuation and proofreading, you're keeping it unintelligible.” — Austin Kleon Copy Share Image
My comedy is for children from three to 93. You do need a slightly childish sense of humour and if you haven't… — Norman Wisdom Copy Share Image
