Humor Quotes · Page 132

Comedies are something I'd be very interesting in doing.

— David Naughton

Dont worry, just breath. If its meant to be, it will find its way…

— Ritu Ghatourey

I think the humor of double puns is incredible.

— Richard Lederer

“Dammit Bard, you're going to set the cat on fire.”

— V.E. Schwab

We are able to laugh when we achieve detachment, if only for a moment.

— May Sarton

“Pelit itu payah! Hemat itu jenius!”

— Yoshichi Shimada

When Caesar says, 'Do this', it is performed.

— William Shakespeare

“She's the kind of person who can lick everything but a stamp.”

— Mark Olmsted

“Life is basically a suspense thriller—except the plot twists are mostly unpaid bills and the villain is usually Monday.”

— Saurabh Dudeja

I have a rare form of body dysmorphia in which I absolutely can't stand how good I look.

— Anthony Jeselnik

I want to get a job naming kitchen appliances. That seems easy; refrigerator, toaster, blender. You just say what the thing does…

— Mitch Hedberg

As a comedy writer, I'm always praying for the day I can tell a self-aware/break-the-fourth-wall style of joke.

— Nicholas Stoller

I think for a heroine to do comedy and action and also be glamorous is a big thing. That's why 'Supreme' will…

— Raashi Khanna

“You're the only kick-ass general I know who needs three gay boys to dress him, John." "But I only need one gay…

— Sarah Black

Everyone has the gift of laughter inside of them. All the world is a prop.

— Carrot Top

I phoned the local ramblers club today and this bloke just went on and on.

— Tim Vine

“Any historian of warfare knows that it is in good part a comedy of errors and a museum of incompetence; but if…

— Richard Hofstadter

“Bill Cosby said it pretty eloquently: “Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you…

— Bob Saget

“Jeth had an unnatural talent for nuclear physics. Should that be a crime? He didn't like governments. Who did? How smart do…

— Tom Francis

“The strangeness of the Barrayaran government system with all its unwritten customs, pressed on Cordelia not so much as first glance but…

— Lois McMaster Bujold

“I guess that was nice of Chiron, for the dogs' sake, but it kind of makes me wonder if he's got a…

— Rick Riordan

“If only Myrtle would pay attention to the Boy's Own Journal, Blackwood's Magazine, etc., she would know that these creatures were Threls,…

— Philip Reeve

“Dear Eldritch Snitch. I slap you with the satin glove of righteous wrath! From what noxious nest of nattering nincompoopery do you…

— James Kennedy

Don't judge anybody until you've walked a mile in their shoes. After that it doesn't matter, because they're a mile away and…

— Anonymous

“The most hilarious person ever is God”

— Alzenati Zenati

I consider myself a bit of a comedian. I write a lot of humorous songs.

— Brad Paisley

Age is just a number... or three... or both.

— Rock Cowles

As the number of Age goes up , the number of friends goes down.

— Amit Verma

“Guards! Summon the holy kitty litter! Mr. Scruffy demands poopsies!”

— Rich Burlew

“Obviously baffled he scrunched his brows and pinched his lips.”

— Elle Klass

“Laugh if you are wise, girl, laugh.”

— Martial

The funny thing is, Dennis Miller got me back into comedy.

— Tommy Chong

“if lying would be a crime, we would all be in jail right now”

— Pll

“The morning slathers its whatever across the thing.”

— Michael Robbins

I love to do comedy, but music is really my heart.

— Paul Shaffer

A girl offered me E at the club. 'Have you ever done E?' 'I watch E.'

— Mike Birbiglia

Respect your parents, they pay for your internet.

— Ritu Ghatourey

I know that to be a true fact because I read it in Heat magazine

— Bill Bailey

“And that, my friends, is how a revolution dies. -Haymitch Abernathy”

— Suzanne Collins

The real reason for comedy is to hide the pain.

— Wendy Wasserstein