Hate me for who I am, I don't care. At least I'm not pretending to be someone I'm not. — Kristen Stewart Copy Share Image
Few can tell what they know without also showing what they do not know. — Ivan Panin Copy Share Image
Evil is impotent and has no power but that which we let it extort from us. — John Galt Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when a really nice lady is helping you and you say Thank you Sir. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when someone tells a funny strory but nobody laughs and then they say it was a — KiDD Heartbreak Copy Share Image
Why does every flight attendant seem like they are going through a divorce? — Natasha Leggero Copy Share Image
A psychiatrist is a fellow who asks you a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Proof that you watch to many horror movies. When you Turn off the downstairs lights and run upstairs so no one kills… — Kollkid Copy Share Image
It was funny being at high school and also grocery shopping and having a job. Other kids were going home to their… — Margaret Qualley Copy Share Image
I was going to tape some records onto a cassette, but I got the wires backwards. I erased the all of the… — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
“In the last couple of weeks I have seen the ads for the Wonder Bra. Is that really a problem in this… — Hugh Grant Copy Share Image
All you crazy white people "I'm American!", all you did was come out of your mother's pussy on American soil. That's it.… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
“I'd asked Dad for the millionth time if, now that I had a baby brother, I could stay in New York….and Dad… — Meg Cabot Copy Share Image
I took my son to Coney island, I said "wanna go in the crazy house?", he said "save your money we'll be… — Rodney Dangerfield Copy Share Image
If a comedian tells a joke that you find funny, you laugh. If he tells a joke you do not find funny,… — Gilbert Gottfried Copy Share Image
