Last time Quote by Jarod Kintz

“After reading one of my one-liners a few years ago, a former professor of mine looked up at me and said, “You remind me…

— Jarod Kintz

“Based solely on the mustache, who would you rather be: Mark Twain, Rollie Fingers, or Frida Kahlo?”

— Jarod Kintz

“I have half a mustache. It was a gift from my father, who bought one with a Buy One Mustache, Get One Half Off…

— Jarod Kintz

“A mustache on a stick would not only be tastier than a popsicle, but ticklier too.”

— Jarod Kintz

“I’m like Twain, Nietzsche, and Dali in that I have three mustaches. (I have two of them disguised as eyebrows). Women love men like…

— Jarod Kintz

“His broomish mustache hung over most of his mouth and was always littered with remnants of his last meal. Not crumbs. Enough to qualify…

— Sam Harris

“Right now I have a milk mustache. I grew it on a cattle ranch, and then glued it to my face.”

— Jarod Kintz

“I admire your mustache madam, but I wonder, what’s for dessert?”

— Jarod Kintz

“He sneers so regularly that I suspect he shaves his mustache only to spare his nose the whisker burn.”

— Meredith Duran

“The day was so wonderful that Bonaventure thought it would taste like cherry pie if he took a bite of it.”

— Rita Leganski

“Two mustaches walk into a bar, and the bartender said, “Can I get you a drink?” Both mustaches turned towards each other but said…

— Jarod Kintz

“I grew a mustache, and I grew it in my garden. My mustache is organic, and will taste tasty on your mouth.”

— Jarod Kintz