Quote by Jarod Kintz

“Ma’am, my hand hurts. May I massage it on your buttocks?”

— Jarod Kintz

“If you let someone sweep you off your feet, you better be prepared to land on your ass.”

— Devan Sipher

“My gaze falls to my legs, and I realize I’m still holding on to my running shorts, which are stuck to my thighs.”

— Patricia Vanasse

“My gaze fall to my legs and if realize I'm still holding on to my running shorts which are stuck to my thighs.”

— Patricia Vanasse

“If I touch it, that ass is gonna go off.”

— Cassie Mae

“Well, fella, as much as I’d like to stick something up your ass, it ain’t gonna be my finger or anything else on my…

— A. Violet End

“And I do love the sight of my hands on your ass, too.”

— Jennifer L. Armentrout

“If instead of a handshake you hold out a fist for a fist bump, I’ll wrap my hand around your fist like it was…

— Jarod Kintz

“Hand off my ass or I'll rip off your balls.”

— Katie McGarry

“I’m supposed to spread my fingers as wide as they were with the rubber band, mash my palms hard into the floor, and pull…

— Christopher McDougall

“Touch my things again, whether I'm dead or not, and I'll kick your ass up into your shoulder blades.”

— MaryJanice Davidson

“Oh cripes, I can hardly walk! I think the circulation‟s getting cut off in my legs.” Shawn's mouth dropped open slightly and he furrowed…

— Jeff Erno