Quote by Jarod Kintz

“I lay warm in bed like a melted marshmallow in a graham cracker. I really wish my blanket wasn’t so rigid and crumbly.
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— Jarod Kintz

“A blanket could be used to smother a fire—but not the fire that burns in my heart for you. Or perhaps that’s merely heartburn,…

— Jarod Kintz

“A blanket could be used to keep you warm on a cold night. Just pour some gasoline on it and light it on fire. 
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— Jarod Kintz

“A blanket might make the ideal politician, because they’re warm, comforting, soft, and easily corruptible.
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— Jarod Kintz

“A blanket could be used as a bathtub tarp, keeping all the body’s heat in, and the police’s and murder victim’s wife’s eyes out.
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— Jarod Kintz

“A blanket could be used to help acclimate your body for your after death experience. Hell is hot, so you’d better warm up first.…

— Jarod Kintz

“A blanket could be used as a distress symbol. You’ll know I’m in danger and in need of rescue, because I’ll be asleep and…

— Jarod Kintz

“A blanket provides warmth. So does the joy a good joke brings.
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— Jarod Kintz

“A blanket could be used to cause global warming. If you don’t want to future generations to die, I’d recommend shivering in your bare…

— Jarod Kintz

“I have an electric blanket, but I think it’s criminal to use it any time other than when I’m sitting in my electric chair.”

— Jarod Kintz

“A blanket could be used to keep your body warm. After all, your body starts cooling off rapidly once you die. But don’t worry,…

— Jarod Kintz

“A blanket could be used like cloud cover
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— Jarod Kintz