Humor Quote by David Foster Wallace

“That food was so bad I can't wait for it to become a turd and leave me.”

— Thomas McGuane

“One thing I don't like about crap: its size that is too big to be digested.”

— Toba Beta

“Grain grows best in shit...”

— Ursula K. Le Guin

“I bought a big bag of potatoes and it's growing eyes like crazy. Other foods rot. Potatoes want to see.”

— Bill Callahan

“I know you have the patience of a rapidly decomposing turd.”

— Mary E. Pearson

When you mix raisins and turds, you've still got turds.

— Charlie Munger

“Lord, I can’t live in his mashed potato world. I need my tubers scalloped and diced and baked and fried and different every time.…

— Lorna Seilstad

“Life is a stew, and pot is poop.If someone stirred even a teeny-bit of poop in the stew, would you really want to eat…

— Maria Semple

“Not everyone can be a truffle. Most of us are potatoes. And a potato is a very good thing to be.”

— Massimo Bottura

“I’m trying to put things in the best light, but a turd’s a turd, whatever light it’s in!”

— Joe Abercrombie

“Shit served on a gold plate to a grateful and welcoming soul is still shit! Potatoes won't change that!”

— Robin Sacredfire

“Enjoy all the fresh or frozen veggies you want, except for potatoes”

— William Davis