Sarcastic Quotes
891 Sarcastic quotes by 449 unique authors
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He was trying to save both his faces.
— John Gunther
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He's the kind of man who picks his friends - to pieces.
— Mae West
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He's the only man I ever knew who had rubber pockets so he could steal soup.
— Wilson Mizner
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He's very clever, but sometimes his brains go to his head.
— Margot Asquith
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I will always love the false image I had of you.
— Ashleigh Brilliant
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She could carry off anything; and some people said that she did.
— Ada Leverson
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She has been kissed as often as a police-court Bible, and by much the same class of people.
— Robertson Davies
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She tells enough white lies to ice a wedding cake.
— Margot Asquith
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She never lets ideas interrupt the easy flow of her conversation.
— Jean Webster
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She plunged into a sea of platitudes, and with the powerful breast stroke of a channel swimmer, made her confident way towards the white cliffs…
— W. Somerset Maugham
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She should get a divorce and settle down.
— Jack Paar
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She was kind of girl who'd eat all your cashews and leave you with nothing but peanuts and filberts.
— Raymond Chandler
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She was like a sinking ship firing on the rescuers.
— Alexander Woollcott
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She's been on more laps than a napkin.
— Walter Winchell
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She's so pure, Moses couldn't even part her knees.
— Joan Rivers
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So boring you fall asleep halfway through her name.
— Alan Bennett
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The finest woman that ever walked the streets.
— Mae West
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The perfection of rottenness.
— William James
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The triumph of sugar over diabetes.
— George Jean Nathan
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There but for the grace of God, goes God.
— Winston Churchill
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You take the lies out of him, and he'll shrink to the size of your hat; you take the malice out of him, and he'll…
— Mark Twain
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You're a mouse studying to be a rat.
— Wilson Mizner
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You were born with your legs apart. They'll send you to the grave in a Y-shaped coffin.
— Joe Orton
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Don't look now, but there's one too many in this room and I think it's you.
— Groucho Marx
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Gee, what a terrific party. Later on we'll get some fluid and embalm each other.
— Neil Simon
Who Wrote These Sarcastic Quotes
449 authors contributed a total of 891 Sarcastic Quotes, led by these top contributors: