All a girl wants is a man to treat her right, among a million other things. — Nikhil Saluja Treat her right Copy Share Image
I really hate idiots. It's so hard to play mind games with them. — Nikhil Saluja Mind games Copy Share Image
I just hired a nineteen year-old russian girl with massive tits to babysit my kids. Now, where the fuck am I going… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Skinny people value their health, fat people McDonalds value menu. — Nikhil Saluja Fat people Copy Share Image
Expectoration: If you go to a political rally, you should EXPECTORATION. — Nikhil Saluja Facebook Copy Share Image
MAKING LOVE: Man: Call it what you want just as long as we end up in bed. Woman: The greatest expression of… — Nikhil Saluja Funny Copy Share Image
When life hands you lemons, squeeze lemon juice into your eyes without blinking. Just to let life know you don't play around. — Nikhil Saluja Lemon juice Copy Share Image
A secret isn't a secret unless you've ruined someone's life by telling it. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
People say 'better late than never' but I believe 'better never than late'. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Sometimes I just wish I could disappear for a while to a place where nothing can go wrong in life. — Nikhil Saluja Facebook Copy Share Image
Rumours? Well at least you're spreading something else besides your legs. — Nikhil Saluja Facebook Copy Share Image
Drunk Twitter because embarrassing myself in one zip code was never enough. — Nikhil Saluja Facebook Copy Share Image
The best thing that can happen to a couple married for fifty years or more is that they both grow nearsighted together. — Nikhil Saluja Facebook Copy Share Image
The best 5 seconds of my life are when I wake up and have no idea I'm a human or have responsibilities. — Nikhil Saluja Life Copy Share Image
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public. — Nikhil Saluja Funny Copy Share Image
If you find a girl that is willing to go through hell just to keep the relationship going, you really shouldn't take… — Nikhil Saluja Love Copy Share Image
If Men Got Pregnant: They'd have to stop saying, I'm afraid I'll drop him. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
A wise man once told me... always believe on your wife choices. — Nikhil Saluja Cool Copy Share Image
If you love something, let it go. If it doesn't comeback, tell everyone she has herpes. — Nikhil Saluja Love Copy Share Image
It takes patience to listen... It takes skill to pretend that you are actually listening. — Nikhil Saluja Attention Copy Share Image
After getting married, the most romantic sex positions is 96. That's where you sleep with your backs to each other and never… — Nikhil Saluja Being cool Copy Share Image
A Woman Never Say: Honey come here! Watch me do a tequila shot off of Stephanie's bare ass! — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Men use love to get sex. Women use sex to get love. Me? I use coupons to get pizza... — Nikhil Saluja Love Copy Share Image
If you're a guy who's into Twilight, have a doctor prescribe you with a heavy dose of man the fuck up. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Guys its 2013. Where are the robot women who just want to be friends because youre amazing and theyd die if they… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
