I do believe that on a whole, women are definitely smarter than men... I also believe that dogs are smarter than women.… — David Cross Copy Share Image
“The selection process is simple. Hubby exhausts every ploy in his psychological arsenal to filter out the liars, fakes, and undesirables. (If… — Daniel Stern Copy Share Image
“She reached down and picked a crab out of a bucket. As it came up it turned out that three more were… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“All the others had the wrong smell – floor polish for the Low, somewhat suspicious incense for the High. Deep in the… — Terry Pratchett Neil Gaiman Copy Share Image
“The monkey didn't help matters any. He was sitting on top of the microbus, just watching the undead plunge to their end.… — Max Brooks Copy Share Image
“Separating fact and fiction in Inca history is impossible, because virtually all the sources available are Spanish accounts of stories that had… — Mark Adams Copy Share Image
“Alasdair yanked a pillow, shoving it under his arse. "I think you'll find I'm a heavy but remarkably fit and supple git,… — josephine myles Copy Share Image
“Will put his hand on Nico's shoulder. "Nico, we need to have another talk about your people skills." "Hey, I'm just stating… — Rick Riordan Copy Share Image
“I often see people on the streets dressed as objects and handing out leaflets. I tend to avoid leaflets but it breaks… — David Sedaris Copy Share Image
“BioLogos claims there is no conflict between the theory of evolution and creationism. Huh? Here is where the creationists seem to have… — G.M. Jackson Copy Share Image
One day, when I came home from work, I accidentally put my car key in the door of my apartment building. I… — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
“Ah, fish, there is no fare Quite like a flounder! They surely will not miss A piece or two from stacks of… — Henry N. Beard Copy Share Image
“I did know what he meant and some of my humor fled and was replaced with a shot of jealousy. I’d just… — Sloane Kennedy Copy Share Image
“But in the time between when something gets thought and when it gets done, the ball hit me square across the side… — John Green Copy Share Image
I don't think it's good when entertainment tries to proselytize and I don't think people ultimately want someone showing up in their… — John Ridley Copy Share Image
A man of knowing attains to a sense of humour. Let this always be remembered. If you see someone who has no… — Rajneesh Copy Share Image
“I’m not interested in teaching books by women... Usually at the beginning of the semester a hand shoots up and someone asks… — David Gilmour Copy Share Image
“Answer me this, if your TV wasn’t broken in the first place then why do you need a new one? If your… — Harken Headers Copy Share Image
“All right, shadow-priest, you've been spying — on what? What state secrets have you learned watching me groom these horses?' 'Only that… — Steven Erikson Copy Share Image
“All in all, when I look at my dating life from the bigger perspective, it pretty much sucks. If it were a… — Laura Preble Copy Share Image
“Sometimes when the sun is shining through the clouds, I like to the park and look up at the sky, after a… — Peter Wilde Copy Share Image
I honestly would tell anyone young to start looking at stories and learning story, because I think that’s the next step after… — Bob Odenkirk Copy Share Image
I think it's important for those of us in a position of responsibility to be firm in sharing our experiences, to understand… — George W. Bush Copy Share Image
“MAYBE YOU SHOULD BE AN ENGLISH MAJOR. AT LEAST, YOU GET TO READ STUFF THAT'S WRITTEN BY PEOPLE WHO CAN WRITE! YOU… — John Irving Copy Share Image
“She jotted down the order, then forced herself to meet his gaze. "It's going to be a bit of a wait, we're… — Mina Khan Copy Share Image
“He tackled a woman's baby carriage. After the seven-month-old baby skidded across the pavement and began bawling his eyes out, Bill Brady… — Jasun Ether Copy Share Image
When they were naming vitamins they must have thought there were going to be way more vitamins than there ended up being.… — Demetri Martin Copy Share Image
“Not going to walk me to the door?" I asked, pretending to be shocked at his lack of gallantry. "Of course I… — Jennifer Lynn Barnes Copy Share Image
Actors are so fortunate. They can choose whether they will appear in tragedy or in comedy, whether they will suffer or make… — Oscar Wilde Copy Share Image
“We have to be rid of all paradigms, I mean all, and go to that place where all paradigms dissolve. That’s what… — Art Hochberg Copy Share Image
“Wow, thank you so much for the compliment!" Patty answered brightly, to end things. At the time, she believed that it was… — Jonathan Franzen Copy Share Image
“Oh, you mean like Orpheo rescuing Euniphon from the Underworld?” said Roland. Rob Anybody just stared. “It’s a myth from Ephebe,” Roland… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Right. Right. Well, if you do see a flying UFO, these government men come and tell you off," said Adam, getting back… — Neil Gaiman Copy Share Image
“Essentially, the whole time I’d been here, the security staff hadn’t been paid. I would have been harassing the management too, though… — Lish McBride Copy Share Image
“At the pet store he picked out two painted turtles, each about as big around as a mayonnaise-jar lid. He bought them… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“Perhaps, if you weren't so busy regarding my shortcomings, you'd find that I do possess redeeming qualities, discreet as they may be.… — Richelle E. Goodrich Copy Share Image
“God works in mysterious ways, baby, and there is never more evidence of this than when your life is going along fairly… — Suzanne Finnamore Copy Share Image
You're talking to a modern, nice, affable German person and they're saying to you something like 'You know, vell, it's a critical… — Dylan Moran Copy Share Image
“Sadly, the natural world is not short of people who believe that rattling off Latin names incessantly makes them appear clever, whereas… — Tristan Gooley Copy Share Image
The difference between tragedy and comedy is the difference between experience and intuition. In the experience we strive against every condition of… — Christopher Fry Copy Share Image