My fans have great senses of humor and eat too much chocolate. — Christopher Moore Chocolate Copy Share Image
“If you're going to learn, you need to forget what you know.” — Christopher Moore Education Copy Share Image
Love: the sickest of Irony’s sick jokes. The place where logic and order go to die. — Christopher Moore Comedy Copy Share Image
“If manta rays are going to be harmless, they should look more harmless, Pardee thought. Fuckers look like aquatic Draculas.” — Christopher Moore Manta Rays Copy Share Image
“Oh my God, you're like Obnoxious and Annoying had an ass baby!” — Christopher Moore Obnoxious Copy Share Image
“not the end of the world, just darkness over everything," Charlie cheerfully said. "it gets dark - turn on a light.” — Christopher Moore Darkness Copy Share Image
Marry for love, stay married, and raise happy children who are quick to laugh and slow to judge. — Christopher Moore Children Copy Share Image
All fear comes from trying to see the future, Biff. If you know what is coming, you aren't afraid. — Christopher Moore Afraid Copy Share Image
“Your puny worm god weapons are useless against my superior Christmas Kung Fu.” — Christopher Moore Weapons Useless Copy Share Image
“I so adored her when she let her warrior queen armor fall, and came, silly and giggling, into my arms.” — Christopher Moore Love Copy Share Image
“Shylock repointed his twitching, accusatory digit at his daughter. “You do not say such things in my house. You—you—you—you—” “Run along, love,… — Christopher Moore Children Copy Share Image
“My skin cleared up! I don't have a single zit." -Tommy Ding, ding, ding," Jody onomatopeed, signaling that Tommy had hit on… — Christopher Moore Christopher-moore Copy Share Image
“For it is written that "if the wise man appears always stupid, his failures do not disappoint, and his success gives pleasant… — Christopher Moore Failure Copy Share Image
“I try to stick to one, single rule, “If you don’t have anything to say, shut the fuck up.” I think that’s… — Christopher Moore Bible Copy Share Image
You can't teach someone to be funny, but you can teach comic timing. If you listen to a good comic, you can… — Christopher Moore Comedy Copy Share Image
“he'd replace the window, but the kid was sleeping in his room from now until she was thirty and married to a… — Christopher Moore Married Copy Share Image
Then someone started pounding on the door. And not a little "Hey, what's up?" pound. Like there was a big sale on… — Christopher Moore Abby Copy Share Image
It's hard for me, a Jew, to stay in the moment. Without the past, where is the guilt? And without the future,… — Christopher Moore Dread Copy Share Image
“Compassion is the same way,' Joshua said. 'That's what the yeti knew. He loved constantly, instantly, spontaneously, without though or words. That's… — Christopher Moore Compassion Copy Share Image
Tommy had felt alone in a crowd before, even inferior to everyone in a crowd, but now he felt, well, different. It… — Christopher Moore Clothes Copy Share Image
If you have come to these pages for laughter, may you find it. If you are here to be offended, may your… — Christopher Moore Adventure Copy Share Image
“Success in America doesn't require any special talent or any kind of extra effort. You just have to be consistent and not… — Christopher Moore Extra effort Copy Share Image
Like looking down on a lubricious chess set, isn't it? The king moves in tiny steps, with no direction, like a drunkard… — Christopher Moore Archer Copy Share Image
As an author, you spend a lot of time by yourself in a room making clicky noises. It gets pretty insulated. You… — Christopher Moore Actually Copy Share Image
Next out of the hall came the sisters and their husbands. Before I could say anything, the captain had clamped his hand… — Christopher Moore Bitter Copy Share Image
“la Ruta de la Seda, que no estaba hecha de seda y que, en realidad, no era sino un sendero estrecho que… — Christopher Moore Amor Copy Share Image
