Sweetheart, wake up; you've destroyed the house and I need you to suffer for it. — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
As much as I encourage communication with my readers, I don't want reviews from them, simply because I don't need to be… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
Like last year I took Advance Foods class (which is like cooking for nerds) after lunch, and so I usually took a… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
Don't drive drunk. Ever. Don't shag anyone you don't like, or who doesn't like you. Get a look at how people live… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
If you have come to these pages for laughter, may you find it. If you are here to be offended, may your… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
Stop," I said. "Please do not further endorken yourself to me. You have great hair and a car that is most fly,… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
The angel has confided in me that he is going to ask the Lord if he can become Spider-Man. [...] The children… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
They want to be tied up, I tie them up. They want to be spanked, I spank them. They want to be… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“Love them all," said Renoir. "That is the secret, young man. Love them all." The painter let go of his arm and shrugged. "Then,… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“I tried cutting myself to express my heartbreak over Tommy (Lord Flood) rejecting me, but OMFG it hurts like flaming fuck.” — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
Canada is a myth people made up to entertain children, like the Tooth Fairy. There’s no such place. — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“I hope you are not here to ask me to do my bawdy business- the monkey has a nosebleed and the circus, sir, is… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“The night was crisp and the stars shone with a cold blue light like loneliness or infinity.” — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“Abby Von Normal - And I'm like, "Don't change the subject, Kung Pao, what I want to know is if you're ready to spend… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“You can't just go around blurting out the truth like a prophet with Tourette's syndrome.” — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“…turning your ankle hurts like hell, even if you're a superhero.” — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
![“The angel has confided in me that he is going to ask the Lord if he can become Spider-Man. [...] The children need heroes, he says. I think he just wants to swing from buildings in tight red jammies.” quote by Christopher Moore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/db9/christopher-moore-353_angel_the-angel-has-confided-in-me-that-he-is_2372029.jpg)
