You don't understand me and never will, so don't start that shit about knowing how I feel. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If I follow you, don't tweet about your boyfriend because I'm your boyfriend until further notice. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I should've known it wasn't going to work out between my ex-wife and me. After all, I'm a Leo and she's a… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If my tweets offend you: 1. I'm sorry. 2. It won't happen again. 3. 1 & 2 are lies. 4. You're a pussy. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
LOVE, That delightful interval between meeting a beautiful girl and discovering that she looks like a haddock {John Barrymore}; — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
This Is The Beginning Of A New Day! You Have Been Given This Day To Use As You Will! — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Ladies, you are delusional if you think you can give me a hand job better than I can. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Fancy restaurant: The only restaurant that serves you cold soup on purpose. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
When you thought I wasn't looking I looked at you and wanted to say,'Thanks for all the things I saw when you… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
When you thought I wasn't looking I saw tears come from your eyes, and I learned that sometimes things hurt, but it's… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I don't wear vanilla-scented lotion or perfume. Most girls love that crap, but I can't do it. 'Cause I can't be the… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
To make it stand, you wet it. To make it wet, you suck it. To make it stiff, you lick it. To… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I don't need beer to have a good time, I just need it to focus, avoid depression, good tweets, fall asleep, and… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I just got engaged. My fiancée won't take my name because Lisa Levin sounds awful. So she's just going to remain Lisa… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Two things in life that are difficult to achieve: 1. To plant your idea in someone's head. 2. To plant someone's money… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Oh, everything's too damned expensive these days. Like this Bible. It cost 15 bucks! And talk about a preachy book! Everybody's a… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Sometimes I look at my awesome twitter followers & think to myself, What the hell would I do without them :) — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I won't be tweeting this sunday. I have better things to do like bashing myself by following girls on streets. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I don't wanna discuss about it - People who want to discuss about it. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Men and women shop differently. Men know what they want before they see it. Women don't know what they want until they see it. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I used to receive virtual smiles, sweet morning and night greetings. Now all I have is silence, and a blistered heart. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Do girls really look at penises and say Wow, I can't wait to put that in my mouth? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Failure doesnt mean you are inferior¦¦ it does mean you are not perfect! — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image