I never knew what an engineer did for a living when I was a kid. I still don't. — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
In Japan, employees occasionally work themselves to death. It's called Karoshi. I don't want that to happen to anybody in my department.… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
As a fan, I'm distraught, but as a cartoonist looking at new vacant spaces in 2400 newspapers, well, behind me, my cats… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“You're thinking I'm one of those wise-ass California vegetarians who is going to tell you that eating a few strips of bacon… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
I wish I were dumber so I could be more certain about my opinions. It looks fun. — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
No matter how many times I visit New York City, I am always struck by the same thing - a yellow taxicab. — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Crackpot is an excellent job because the expectations are so low. No one ever tells crackpots that they should be doing more. — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
The most ineffective workers are systematically moved to the place where they can do the least damage: management. — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
The creator of the universe works in mysterious ways. But he uses a base ten counting system and likes round numbers. — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“If you think your odds of solving your problem are bad, don’t rule out the possibility that what is really happening is that you… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Frankly, I’m suspicious of anyone who has a strong opinion on a complicated issue. — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“If you want success, figure out the price, then pay it. It sounds trivial and obvious, but if you unpack the idea it has… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
For five hundred dollars, I'll name a subatomic particle after you. Some of my satisfied customers include Arthur C. Quark and George Meson. — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“Failure always brings something valuable with it. I don’t let it leave until I extract that value.” — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“On all the important stuff, we are emotional creatures who make decisions first and rationalize them after the fact.” — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“What you rarely see is a stillborn failure that transmogrifies into a stellar success. Small successes can grow into big ones, but failures rarely… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“Because everything you perceive is a metaphor for something your brain is not equipped to fully understand. God is as real as the clothes… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“Capitalism is rotten at every level, and yet it adds up to something extraordinarily useful for society over time. The paradox of capitalism is… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
