For five hundred dollars, I'll name a subatomic particle after you. Some of my satisfied customers include Arthur C. Quark and George… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Science is a good thing. News reporters are good things too. But it's never a good idea to put them in the… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“I don’t trust the science behind the vegetarian movement because the believers have agendas beyond nutrition. Some vegetarians are in the lifestyle… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Dogbert gazing at night sky No matter how bad the day is, the stars are always there. Dilbert Actually, many of them… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Every generation of humans believed it had all the answers it needed, except for a few mysteries they assumed would be solved… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Ratbert (as lab rat, to scientist): Doc, we have to talk. Every day you feed me over a hundred pounds of macaroni… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Scientists will eventually stop flailing around with solar power and focus their efforts on harnessing the only truly unlimited source of energy… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Dogbert: So, Since Columbus is dead, you have no evidence that the earth is round. Dilbert: Look. You can Ask Senator John… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Dilbert: Evolution must be true because it is a logical conclusion of the scientific method. Dogbert: But science is based on the… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Dilbert: I'm obsessed with inventing a perpetual motion machine. Most scientists think it's impossible, but I have something they don't. Dogbert: A… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Simple molecules combine to make powerful chemicals. Simple cells combine to make powerful life-forms. Simple electronics combine to make powerful computers. Logically,… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Newsreader: A huge asteroid could destroy Earth! And by coincidence, that's the subject of tonight's miniseries. Dogbert: In science, researchers proved that… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Dilbert: It took weeks but I've calculated a new theory about the origin of the universe. According to my calculations it didn't… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Scientists often invent words to fill the holes in their understanding.These words are meant as conveniences until real understanding can be found.… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Great minds don't think alike. If they did, the Patent Office would only have about fifty inventions. — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Some physicists describe gravity in terms of ten dimensions all curled up. But those aren't real words-just placeholders, used to refer to… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
In the future, airplanes will be flown by a dog and a pilot. And the dog's job will be to make sure… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Dilbert: You joined the "Flat Earth Society?" Dogbert: I believe the earth must be flat. There is no good evidence to support… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Boss: I just heard that light travels faster than sound. I'm wondering if I should shout when I speak, just so my… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Dogbert: Scientists have discovered the gene that makes some people love golf. Dilbert: How can they tell it's the golf gene? Dogbert:… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“Scientists often invent words to fill the holes in their understanding. These words are meant as conveniences until real understanding can be… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Every credible scientist on earth says your products harm the environment. I recommend paying weasels to write articles casting doubt on the… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Dinosaur: I plan to use punctuated equilibrium to turn this zit into a third eye. Catbert: That's not a natural advantage. You'd… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Computers and rocket ships are examples of invention, not of understanding. ... All that is needed to build machines is the knowledge… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
The creator of the universe works in mysterious ways. But he uses a base ten counting system and likes round numbers. — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“If you think your odds of solving your problem are bad, don’t rule out the possibility that what is really happening is that you… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Frankly, I’m suspicious of anyone who has a strong opinion on a complicated issue. — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“If you want success, figure out the price, then pay it. It sounds trivial and obvious, but if you unpack the idea it has… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
For five hundred dollars, I'll name a subatomic particle after you. Some of my satisfied customers include Arthur C. Quark and George Meson. — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“Failure always brings something valuable with it. I don’t let it leave until I extract that value.” — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“On all the important stuff, we are emotional creatures who make decisions first and rationalize them after the fact.” — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“What you rarely see is a stillborn failure that transmogrifies into a stellar success. Small successes can grow into big ones, but failures rarely… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“Because everything you perceive is a metaphor for something your brain is not equipped to fully understand. God is as real as the clothes… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“Capitalism is rotten at every level, and yet it adds up to something extraordinarily useful for society over time. The paradox of capitalism is… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
