Don't write us off. Nobody thought we'd win the World Series in 2005, but we did. There are years when we think… — Jerry Reinsdorf Copy Share Image
Journalists said they had never seen so many funny women as leads when we did 'Hotwives' - we had a cast of… — Danielle Schneider Copy Share Image
What's special with 'Corrie' is that they have the comedy element, women are funny as well - they might do the emotional… — Michelle Keegan Copy Share Image
People would be in hysterics if they saw that. It's like, wow, he's a superhuman moron… So he wears lipstick, has a… — Robert Pattinson Copy Share Image
We didn't have rehab back in the Seventies. Back in the Seventies, rehab meant you stopped doing coke, but you kept smoking… — Denis Leary Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when you're checking yourself out in the window of another car and realize there's someone inside. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“The shrine I prayed at not to go to university,” Sand said. “I guess your prayer was answered,” Perrotte said. Sand strongly… — Merrie Haskell Copy Share Image
Jesse Tyler Ferguson is probably one of the funniest people I've ever met in my life. Everything the kid does is funny.… — Jesse L. Martin Copy Share Image
It is commonly believed that anyone who tabulates numbers is a statistician. This is like believing that anyone who owns a scalpel… — Robert Hooke Copy Share Image
If we have to have a choice between being dead and pitied, and being alive with a bad image, we'd rather be… — Golda Meir Copy Share Image
I feel like people only want to hear me say funny things. Like, I don't tweet about my kids or being a… — Kaitlin Olson Copy Share Image
Wrestling has a funny way of regenerating itself, and I'm sure, in the past, a lot of people have asked questions about… — Finn Balor Copy Share Image
“My body is tired as worn out rug, but my brain (if i had) is always full of curiosity, jumping around for… — Hiroko Sakai Copy Share Image
I have the will to do and dare...but my body doesn't agree. Ah well, at least no one can say that I… — Vatsal Agrawal Copy Share Image
“I want to rip the rest of those buttons open and climb him like a monkey in a banana tree. Oh God,… — Heather M. Orgeron Copy Share Image
What is the best thing to do when you have a hole in a boat and water is leaking inside? Make another… — Hussein Nishah Copy Share Image
LADIES: You should never beg for a guys commitment to you . If he wants you, he'll do whatever it takes to… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Even in fiction, I feel rigorous honesty applies. It doesn't apply to facts; it applies to what I think of as not… — Siri Hustvedt Copy Share Image
If a girl asks you a question, its better to just tell her the truth, chances are she's asking you because she… — Scarlet Kim Copy Share Image
“He watched in awe as she stacked up an enormous armload of music. "There," she finished, slapping Frank Zappa's Greatest Hits on… — Gordon Korman Copy Share Image
“Mom," say Malia Obame, "why dont you go get the photo albem of dad when he was a small boy, maybe it… — Seinfeld 2000 Copy Share Image
“Easy for you to say. You're the one who got plowed. I was doing the plowing." Cam's mouth opened. Oh my God,… — Jennifer L. Armentrout Copy Share Image
3 Things I know about you: 1) You cannot say P without your lips touching 2) You just tried 3) Youre now smiling and Sharing this — Ronde Dawson Copy Share Image
Age has extremely little to do with anything that matters. The difference between one age and other is, as a rule, enormously… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Dear ugly people, if you ever feel that you hate your life, don't worry, you are not alone. I hate your life… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
It's funny how a hello is always accompanied with a goodbye. It's funny how good memories can make you cry, it's funny… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
In the '80s, it was difficult and frustrating to appear in the theater and TV again, even though I had some successful… — David Cassidy Copy Share Image
I've never been in love with Marcello [Mastroianni]. I wasn't even attracted to him physically. I admired him. I followed him and… — Giovanna Cau Copy Share Image
“I shot him a look. "That bouncer was really big." His lips quirked. "Oh, Kitten, see, I try not to say bad… — Jennifer L. Armentrout Copy Share Image
“She had no idea how long they kissed—and kissed—but she didn’t think about stopping until she ran out of air. Breathing hard,… — Jill Shalvis Copy Share Image
Those really long car rides with your family and you just blast your iPod, look out the window,and block out the world. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Dear Google, Please stop behaving like a GIRL. Will u please allow me to complete the whole sentence before you start guessing… — Ritu Ghatourey Copy Share Image
People get burned out in big families, you can even see it in the naming of children. Like the first kid, "You… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
I applied the same mentality to my social media as I did when I was doing my boot camps. I thought, well,… — Joe Wicks Copy Share Image
Have you ever loved someone so much, you wanted to keep them hidden from the world & all to yourself? Well, apparently… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Everything went smoothly at the sailing events today, except for the British team. They forgot to bring limes and they all got… — Craig Ferguson Copy Share Image
By making the gay character funny and sweet but above all normal, you make a far better, longer lasting statement than you… — Sue Perkins Copy Share Image
“Naomi's my girlfriend," I say aloud, just to test the words, see how they feel fucking across my lips. Ronnie flips a… — C.M. Stunich Copy Share Image
I love to do comedy, and I don't think of things as drama or comedy. I think that if it's a funny… — Kathy Baker Copy Share Image
“A clue! From M!" "Who's M?" "Maybe M is for Mackintosh! Maybe Grabes ans Mackintosh are in cahoots!" "Or maybe M is… — Mac Barnett Copy Share Image