“Bestseller doesn’t necessarily mean good writer. I think it takes 10,000 book sales to make the bestseller’s list, and at about 9… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“You can read until you’re blue in the face, but I’d recommend writing until you’re red in the face. And ass.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“My book is a light read. Seriously, it probably weighs 3.33 ounces. That’s pretty impressive, considering it’s an ebook.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I’m writing a book, one letter at a time. After thirteen days, I just finished writing “Once upon a time.” Since it’s… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I won't read a book whose pages have been dog-eared, because I'm more of a cat person.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I have a list of pet names for Cap’n so long that it could fill a phone book (if the phone book… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Before bed I do a bit of light reading. I’m reading a 50-pound book on midgets.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“My new book is going well. It’s practically writing itself! Actually, what I mean is I’m not writing it, my clone is.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“What I like most about reading is I can read in minutes what it took the author hours to write. What I… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“The country with the most writers is ironically probably the country with the least readers—USA. And once my parents die, my entire… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A brick could be used to stop people from reading my book. Just place the brick on the book’s cover, to discourage… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“The bad news is most of my books are ebooks and aren't for sale in brick-and-mortar bookstores. The good news is that… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I am fun, friendly, and I know how to use the third comma in a list of three distinct items or things.… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Reading a book is like having the ability to dip a straw into the author’s soul and sip and slurp without lowering… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“One of my hobbies is reading finance and economic books—at the strip club, where I “invest” my money.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“You could say my book is the best book ever (or worst book ever), and it wouldn’t make it any better (or… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“If laughter came in paste format you could squeeze out of a tube, I’ll bet nine out of ten dentists would recommend… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I want to write a book called “Conversations.” Of course, it’s all talk at this point.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I prefer physical books to eBooks, because an eBook can’t be the solution to a wobbly chair like a real book can.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I sped-read through a book that probably weighed a pound, though I only gleaned about nine ounces of information. That's because it… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I hope you enjoy reading my book as much as I didn’t enjoy writing it. Just kidding! I hope you don’t enjoy… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Hooray! I finally finished making a new book cover. Now I just need to write the book. The cover is the image… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I notice when you’re gone. Or do I? How can I observe something that isn’t there?” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A blanket could be used to make sweet, sweet music with the love of your life. Hopefully that person is me, because I’ve been… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A brick could be used to slow down time. Sort of like a camel in a wheelchair pushed by a thirsty Arab. Hey, Khalid,… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“We have a love so pure that it makes snow seem yellow. (Don’t eat it!)” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I hid Mrs. Frozenwater’s body in the ice cube trays in my freezer. Better to keep her there than let her memory thaw out… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Two similar words might lead to two similar ideas. They might also lead to the basement, which I recently converted into a dungeon/torture chamber.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Nothing is and isn’t; nothing is and isn’t—nothing itself is, and at the same time, nothing isn’t.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“There’s only one piece of clothing I could eat fast, and that’s a scarf.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Dora J. Arod is to Jarod Ora, as yes is to yes. Yes is also the correct answer to “Will you marry me?” Other… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“The best part about being kidnapped is being blindfolded and getting kicked into the trunk of a car. Boy, normally I have to beg… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
