You should never be mean to other girls. I don't care what grade you're in. Be nice to people until you're my… — Chelsea Handler Copy Share Image
“Nathaniel gave a dramatic sigh, "Oh to be perched in the rigging of the seabird, with no griping land-lovers about and only… — Nicole Sager The Heart of Arcrea Copy Share Image
My favorite laser disk ever was the laser disk for The Graduate, which had a commentary track that wasn't even the filmmakers,… — Jay Roach Copy Share Image
My tendency to make up stories and lie compulsively for the sake of my own amusement takes up a good portion of… — Chelsea Handler Copy Share Image
In looking for humor, keep in mind this guideline: Sometimes it takes a little time to see the humor in your upsets;… — Allen Klein Copy Share Image
“Falon stared at Del intently, trying to figure out what was different. As usual, Del was impeccably dressed in a lavender dress… — Robin Alexander Copy Share Image
“I made the sympathetic face, and the interested face, and even the impressed face. I did not say, 'In the name of… — Meg Howrey Copy Share Image
People find the humor in life all the time. And you have to in order to make it through real life. Like,… — Jason Mitchell Copy Share Image
Because he knows you have to laugh at the things that hurt you just to keep yourself in balance, just to keep… — Ken Kesey Copy Share Image
“Frederick left the young couple gazing into each other’s eyes. Revolting, the way otherwise sensible people could carry on, he decided. Something… — Caroline Stevermer Copy Share Image
“The house was decorated in unrelieved white and black. The people were, too. If it were up to me, I would carry… — Karen Marie Moning Copy Share Image
“Ah man. I remember the days of lying to my mother about a boy. Once I had a boy hidden in the… — Amy Sherman-Palladino Copy Share Image
“I clenched my jaw as hard as I could. It wasn't much of a stretch to keep pretending to be angry, but… — Jim Butcher Copy Share Image
None of us is perfect. Everyone has got a skeleton in the closet that they don't want people to find out. I… — Ozzy Osbourne Copy Share Image
If you cry ''Forward'' you must be sure to make clear the direction in which to go. Don't you see that if… — Anton Chekhov Copy Share Image
If golf wasn't enjoyable and there wasn't a lot of humor and enjoyment, even though the game is so frustrating, you would… — Ray Romano Copy Share Image
I was writing stand up comedy for TV for around 5 years and just wanted to attempt it myself. Vir Das started… — Varun Grover Copy Share Image
Live comedy in a club, with an audience - it's hard to recreate that experience in a digital world. With Zoom, your… — Sarah Cooper Copy Share Image
I saw a lady on TV, she was born without arms. That's sad, but then they said, "Lola does not know the… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
“Then you do not belong here. Death holds no sweetness in this house. We are not warriors, nor soldiers, nor swaggering bravos… — George R.R. Martin Copy Share Image
“Alone in the observatory late one night, I heard the telephone ring persistently. When I answered, a voice, betraying a well-advanced state… — Carl Sagan Copy Share Image
Dogs have fleas; people have each other. We are born to die. Life is a continuing tragic comedy. Everything and everyone we… — Frederick Lenz Copy Share Image
I like telling stories with a sense of humor. But humor can also distance you from the subject you're writing about. I'm… — Jens Lekman Copy Share Image
If you're going to have a book full of clever people and nobody ever jokes, it's just not going to ring true… — Patrick Rothfuss Copy Share Image
“As regards structure, comedy has come a long way since Shakespeare, who in his festive conclusions could pair off any old shit… — Martin Amis Copy Share Image
I think Bigfoot is blurry, that's the problem. It's not the photographer's fault. Bigfoot is blurry, and that's extra scary to me.… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
“Looks like Kelsey wins the award for early riser. And doesn’t she look purtier than a pat of butter meltin’ all over… — Colleen Houck Copy Share Image
You know, I was a huge fan of comedy and movies and TV growing up, and I was able to memorize and… — Hank Azaria Copy Share Image
I love doing comedy. You don't get many good comedy scripts. They're rare. But, I do love playing comedy. Even in drama,… — Colm Meaney Copy Share Image
“On November 18 of alternate years Mr Earbrass begins writing 'his new novel'. Weeks ago he chose its title at random from… — Edward Gorey Copy Share Image
“Her lips taste like mint from toothpaste or gum, or sometimes like cherries or grapes from her lip gloss. She's soft when… — Susan Vaught Copy Share Image
I definitely relate so much to a lot of women in comedy, but I don't love segregating the genders. I'm just as… — Abbi Jacobson Copy Share Image
Funny as hell, searingly honest, and urgently real, Sam Pink's Rontel puts to shame most modern fiction. His writing perfectly captures the… — Joe Meno Copy Share Image
I'm hugely negative, so if a joke doesn't land it takes me a long time to get over it. If something doesn't… — Romesh Ranganathan Copy Share Image
“Okay, that was, I have to say, about the cheesiest thing I ever heard in my life,” I say to Angela as… — Cynthia Hand Copy Share Image
Wisdom is for statues. Humor uncaps our inhibitions, unleashes our energies, seals friendships, patches hurts. Laughing is probably the most alive you… — James Wolcott Copy Share Image
The thing I have learned, especially in the Internet age, probably the easiest thing in the world is to declare that something… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
“But we left camp after a while and we was driving in a real spooky place cause all the roads up near… — Timothy Victor Richardson Copy Share Image
“It goes without saying that even those of us who are going to hell will get eternal life—if that territory really exists… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
I'm really depressing. Some people watch comedy to relax. I watch 21 Grams. I can recognize sadness and tragedy really easily because… — Lykke Li Copy Share Image
