I always try to keep in mind that while the characters in a farce may find themselves in outrageous dilemmas, and may… — Rupert Holmes Copy Share Image
“I’m bored of this. I want to hear about you. Favorite color. Go.” I laugh. “Green.” “I’m green!” “Fuck yeah you are.”… — Hannah Moskowitz Copy Share Image
“I’ll stab him,” offers Jaden as she makes a stabbing motion. “You expect me to play along?” Rob scoffs, gripping his arm… — Laura Kreitzer Copy Share Image
“A punching bag. The guy was pounding on a punching bag. That realization took about a nanosecond to register in her brain… — Susan Donovan Copy Share Image
British comedy - which has been a big inspiration to me for many years - is very different to Australian comedy and… — Jason Gann Copy Share Image
I seem to get into situations that make people laugh, but I don't consider myself that funny of a person. I'm not… — Nathan Fielder Copy Share Image
The English are worried about the Euro being brought in because of loss of national identity and rising prices. In Scotland, people… — Frankie Boyle Copy Share Image
“My backup plan is to challenge Bearbreaker to single combat, defeat him, become Queen of the Zerkers and spend the rest of… — D.D. Barant Copy Share Image
“What are you thinking, Bliss?” I should have said, you. Naked. That would have shocked him. Not that I was actually thinking… — Cora Carmack Copy Share Image
The part that wasn't a jackpot was his baseball mound of red pubic hair that looked like it had literally been attached… — Chelsea Handler Copy Share Image
I use a lot of humor, and I follow the saying that if you want to tell people the truth, you better… — Sayed Kashua Copy Share Image
“The revelation that I’m destined to meet many virgins from the East and the promise of limitless love they hold in their… — Merlin Franco Copy Share Image
“The truth is I’m a chicken shit coward who’s afraid of a girl like you. When I’m with you, I want things… — Jenny Lyn Copy Share Image
“From her own life experience Keldaren knew that loveable hunks were in short supply anywhere in the galaxy, loveable hunks who knew… — L.L. Watkin Copy Share Image
“[H]is first purpose was to explain himself, and before they reached Mr. Allen's grounds he had done it so well that Catherine… — Jane Austen Copy Share Image
When comedy is good, it's jazz. The beats of it, the looseness, the improvisational part, the music-the way you hit the inflection,… — Billy Crystal Copy Share Image
“Briston shakes his head in answer, and slowly walks over to the sword. He cautiously stretches out his hand, which I can… — Brandy Nacole Copy Share Image
“Rustin knew that Tommy was right. It was high time he stopped being so passive. After all, he'd moved halfway across the… — Jeff Erno Copy Share Image
“We were a minor league team that didn't feed into any majors, in a town that loved just about every sport but… — Dan Wells Copy Share Image
“It was the music that finally roused Leo back to consciousness. “Hey. I like that old song,” he croaked, completely oblivious to… — Delora Dennis Copy Share Image
As the colonel and I sat swapping stories in the plane, a jet aircraft buzzed past our window. I asked the colonel… — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
“You know who I pray to? Joe Pesci. Two reasons: First of all, I think he's a good actor, okay? To me,… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
I do a lot of comedy and I like that. I am happy doing funny films. I am often the straight person… — Kristin Davis Copy Share Image
“I asked a nurse for dental floss and was told that I am not allowed dental floss. Apparently dental floss can be… — Emily Austin Copy Share Image
Has anyone seen me on Letterman? Two million people watch that show and I don't know where they are. You might have… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
“Kevin doesn't just wake up with that spiky bedhead look, Pudge. He works for it. He loves that hair. They leave their… — John Green Copy Share Image
If you're hired to be a funny person, you have to trust your judgment but also be open because sometimes you think… — Paula Pell Copy Share Image
“Yep, she called to me from the parking lot of abandoned cars. The sun was shining though her windows like a beacon… — Alexandra Bracken Copy Share Image
I think comedy is so much easier to do on the page than it is in real life. When I'm writing, comedy… — Joshua Ferris Copy Share Image
I am interested in complex characters who are difficult and have numerous sides. But I would love to do a comedy role… — Eugene Simon Copy Share Image
“The silent horror of Archie's ordeal had been temporarily replaced by the howling, agonising pain of the blood refusing to drain from… — Dylan Perry Copy Share Image
“Trying to drown me woman?" 'You can't drown a SEAL,' she said. 'How embarrassing would that be?' 'God yes. Shoot me, hang… — Maya Banks Copy Share Image
“Tayla cursed under her breath. "I was just explaining to Eidolon that Sin is a Smurfette." Wraith swung his big body around… — Larissa Ione Copy Share Image
It's no big secret that 'thinking' women, since they are already gifted with fully functioning brains, are more than happy to have… — Andrea Jeremiah Copy Share Image
“If I was going to be a woman, I would want to be as beautiful as possible. And they said to me,… — Dustin Hoffman Copy Share Image
The words we use have weight. Whether it's in a conversation with a friend or something said publicly on stage or broadcast.… — Hari Kondabolu Copy Share Image
“Junco, I did save your life. Ya had a bad concussion. It was a mistake to fall asleep. I was just tryin'… — J.A. Huss Copy Share Image
My mother is very funny. She is from a village; she has a typical village kind of humour. Often she says a… — Kapil Sharma Copy Share Image
“If by ‘foe’ you mean a brutal killer, then I suppose I’d fall into the ‘friend’ category,” I replied cynically. “Although in… — M.A. George Copy Share Image
I am interested in entertaining people, in bringing pleasure, particularly laughter, to others, rather than being concerned with 'expressing' myself with obscure… — Anonymous Copy Share Image