After God created the world, He made man and woman. Then, to keep the whole thing from collapsing, He invented humor. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I've always been a figure skater and ballet dancer. I love physical comedy, and any chance that I get to do that...… — Allison Janney Copy Share Image
“If we want less and less, we may in fact receive more and more of what we need. It may work like… — Art Hochberg Copy Share Image
My career is chequered. Then I think I got pigeon-holed in humour; Shakespeare is not my thing. — Maggie Smith Copy Share Image
I actually pay careful attention to that sort of thing - infusing humor into my films - because that's how important I… — Park Chan-wook Copy Share Image
“If the second date seems to be going well, it's pretty much a given that by dessert I'll renounce my faith” — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
It's a lot of people's goal to be the lead in a movie, and that was never my goal. I just wanted… — Paul Rust Copy Share Image
“Well, of course. But, we already knew that. I mean... I am kind of a big deal-Matt Carter” — Natasha Larry Copy Share Image
“On the way over, however, it slid off the shovel and onto Henry's shoes. Pity, that. She whirled around. He waited for… — Julia Quinn Copy Share Image
My dad's my biggest fan. When I went to college, my dad came into my life in full-on dad mode. I was… — Jo Koy Copy Share Image
I've always taken a lot of cues from comedy minds. The guy that discovered me in the very beginning was Joseph Cates.… — David Copperfield Copy Share Image
“You'll think of me every time you go to bed. Then you'll get hard and you'll have no one to help you… — George R.R. Martin Copy Share Image
I spent more time in America, but I developed a very English sense of humour. I clicked into it deeply with Peter… — Christopher Guest Copy Share Image
“Go didn't like grilled cheese; she was scooping peanut butter out of the jar onto saltines. When a commercial break came on,… — Gillian Flynn Copy Share Image
I don't want to have my face on the cover of a Wheaties box. I wanna have my face on the cover… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
The problem with a lot of comedy clubs is not that they are a comedy club; it's just the cheesy way they're… — Todd Barry Copy Share Image
“...What do people think about my staying with Harrison with him chasing everything that's hot and hollow?” — Dashiell Hammett Copy Share Image
“Don’t tell me you have OCD about this?” “OCD, ADHD—pretty sure if they come up with some new acronym tomorrow I’d have… — Cyma Rizwaan Khan Copy Share Image
I went to a restaurant with my friend, and he said, "Pass the salt." I said, "Screw you! Sit closer to the… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
Heck by the time a man scratches his behind, clears his throat, and tells me how smart he is, we've already wasted… — Lyndon B. Johnson Copy Share Image
I don't know if humor has a place for it but being light hearted does and not to take it too seriously. — John Assaraf Copy Share Image
And I definitely gravitate toward people who use laughter to pull themselves out of the abyss. — Lea Thompson Copy Share Image
“When there's a monster under your bed sometimes it really is best not to look.” — Jocelynn Drake Copy Share Image
“I'm the first to admit that I don't write right. Now, relax and enjoy the show! The sideshow, that is.” — Lori R. Lopez Copy Share Image
“If the sky falls, we shall catch larks./Když nebe padá , zjímáme skřivani.” — Czech proverb Copy Share Image
I love playing people who don't have a sense of humor for instance, there's nothing funnier to me than a person with… — Rita Moreno Copy Share Image
Remember what the Bible says: He who is without sin, cast the first rock. And I shall smoketh it. — Dave Chappelle Copy Share Image
I got some tartar-control toothpaste a while back. I've still got tartar, but it's under control. — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
“Diplomacy is the delicate weapon of the civilized warrior."- Hun, A. T.” — Robert Lynn Asprin Copy Share Image
“Jenny can still suck a golf ball through a garden hose and she guns my cock like a champ since she misplaced… — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“In a world of full of manipulation, half-truths and lies, the conspiracy theory is often a safer bet than the official story.” — Gary Hopkins Copy Share Image
“Dance in the rain, follow the path of lovely lanes, you are what you always wanted to be, so chill out, dear… — Santosh Kalwar Copy Share Image
I used to own an ant farm but had to give it up. I couldn't find tractors small enough to fit it. — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
There were too many idiot men in the world, to her way of thinking. And most of them ended up bumping up… — Nora Roberts Copy Share Image
I was raised in the West. The west of Texas. It's pretty close to California. In more ways than Washington, D.C., is… — George W. Bush Copy Share Image
I went to the doctor. I said to him "I'm frightened of lapels." He said, "You've got cholera." — Tim Vine Copy Share Image
“He cracked his crooked smile that made all women swoon except the ones who wanted to slap him. Faye was a fence-sitter… — Sarah Scheele Copy Share Image
“Why do you tell me you love me only when you're drunk or dreaming? she asked. I have awful timing, said Simon” — Cassandra Clare Copy Share Image
“I call the Change of Life "Orchids" because menopause is such an ugly word. It's got men in it for goddsakes.” — Lisa Jey Davis Copy Share Image
The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
