“I took a deep breath and sighed in awe. My proverbial penis had just gotten a serious chubby.” — J.L. McCoy Copy Share Image
“Studies show adolescent males often make decisions based on sex. Many fail to grow out of it.” — Nora Roberts Copy Share Image
“FEBRIZIUM();” said Buggeroff, and the foul smell immediately disappeared as if by, well − Magic.” — Sorin Suciu Copy Share Image
Last week my tie caught on fire, some guy tried to put it out with an axe. — Rodney Dangerfield Copy Share Image
“You're in trouble for that," I told Bennett. "Will said he's going to 'Vietcong' on you” — Christina Lauren Copy Share Image
I don't understand how somebody wouldn't have a sense of humor about themselves. — John Malkovich Copy Share Image
“You know, he doesn't have to be the only one bopped in the noggin when noggin-boppin' time rolls around.” — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“Just assume that you don’t know anything – that’s a good place to start from in any situation.” — Art Hochberg Copy Share Image
“It was too early for any of my friends to have come home. Hell, it wasn't even nine yet, which meant it… — J. Lynn Copy Share Image
For Keeping the Faith, I looked at [George ] Cukor's old films like The Philadelphia Story, stuff that's hilariously funny and really… — Edward Norton Copy Share Image
I was stuck in traffic and I looked in the mirror and in the car behind me there was a couple having… — Demetri Martin Copy Share Image
As I write, I control my anxiety and anguish thanks to the invaluable aid of irony and humor. But every night I… — Enrique Vila-Matas Copy Share Image
“At the age of fifteen he had bought off a twopenny stall in the market a duo-decimo book of recipes, gossip, and… — Anthony Burgess Copy Share Image
The stuff I did in 'Rescue Me' was great. It gave me the opportunity to play comedy, and Denis Leary was the… — Kevin Chapman Copy Share Image
It's funny, because when I was in college, all my professors said, 'You should do comedy.' And I was like, 'No! No!'… — Rachael Harris Copy Share Image
“Boys, the longer you wait to get my requested prehistoric attack dogs, the more chance we have of people we care about… — Gini Koch Copy Share Image
My car broke down outside Pizza Hut last night. So I ordered a pizza to be delivered to my house and got… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Don't bend over backwards for a person that's never there for you UNLESS you're bending over for them to kiss your ass. — Sonya Parker Copy Share Image
Now did you know if a stick insect laid it's eggs in a jar of Bovril it will give birth to a… — Tim Vine Copy Share Image
“Want to come over to my place?" I asked him. The sparkle in his eyes danced in humor. "I don't know," he… — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
“The last time everyone loved or at least liked everyone was when the world had a population of about 4.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
I'd love to do a comedy like 'Bridesmaids;' I think that would be so fun. I would play the Kristen Wiig character. — Emma Roberts Copy Share Image
“When I said I'd follow you to hell and back, I wasn't trying to be literal, princess.” — Julie Kagawa Copy Share Image
“Abrakadabra, und alles verwandelt sich in einen großen Haufen Scheiße.” — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“If you keep little decisions small - then big decisions will even be smaller.” — Art Hochberg Copy Share Image
“well I believe in commitment it's just I, you know, I don't stick to it.” — Jim Lewis Copy Share Image
Stand-up comedy is tough right now. Anybody can come to a concert, tape you, and put you up on the Internet. You… — Jeff Dunham Copy Share Image
I've always liked using humor, but what I had to with 'Chewing Gum' was take out a lot of darkness so it… — Michaela Coel Copy Share Image
“You couldn't find your dick in the dark, you scheming, sleaze-mongering scumwad.” — Nenia Campbell Copy Share Image
If a person doesn't have the capacity that we all want that person to have, I suspect hope is in the far… — George W. Bush Copy Share Image
My pillow is my best hair styler, every morning I wake up with a new hair style. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Why do porn sites have a 'Share to Facebook' button? Who watches porn and thinks, 'You know who'd really enjoy this? My… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I've never belonged to any group that didn't have at least one member who wasn't a total dick. — Rock Cowles Copy Share Image
When I go to the movies, I like romance, comedy, and thrillers. I hate gore. — Peter Weller Copy Share Image
“Have you guys ever thought about the fact that socks are like the donut holes of underpants?” — Travis McElroy Copy Share Image
When I first started doing comedy, there was no such thing as a room that had black people and white people in… — Trevor Noah Copy Share Image
I'm actually not funny. I'm just really mean and people think I'm joking. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Or, rather, you irritate everyone, Curdle. Because you're so unreliable.' 'I'm not always unreliable, Telorast.” — Steven Erikson Copy Share Image
I think there's too many gay jokes in comedy and not enough honest explorations of sexuality. — Chris Gethard Copy Share Image
“Today-Everyone want to tell their stories but nobody has time to listen others” — Ali Abidi'en Copy Share Image
![“For Keeping the Faith, I looked at [George ] Cukor's old films like The Philadelphia Story, stuff that's hilariously funny and really smart with a cutting critique in the humor, too. With this, when I read it, I was laughing a lot.” quote by Edward Norton](https://sms4smile.com/q/i/d16/edward-norton-2203_critique_for-keeping-the-faith-i-looked-at-george_670018.jpg)
