“Oh, man," he mumbled with a full mouth. "At least the food is good.” — James Dashner Copy Share Image
“Writing is my dream. From romance to dragons; fairies to fantasy worlds, this is where I live and play. Thanks be to… — Lisa Hannah Wells Copy Share Image
I love Philly so much. I know that at any time, any place, a fight can break out. Those are great comedy… — Jim Norton Copy Share Image
“The average adult has had sex innumerable times more than they have formed an opinion of their own.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
I started comedy in 2006. I didn't even think it was a thing I could do. — Yvonne Orji Copy Share Image
“Talk about solid turds all you want. The molecular integrity of shit is small potatoes.” — David Foster Wallace Copy Share Image
True love is when you tell a man that you love his pink shirt and he ends up wearing it everyday — Mercy Oheona Copy Share Image
“I would just like to add that it is perfectly okay for students to wear animal costumes in class, but hats are… — Jane Morris Copy Share Image
“I love talking to spirits. Maybe we can try contacting Marilyn Monroe or Elvis Presley next.” — Jody Morse Copy Share Image
“For their never-ending endeavours to obtain or retain wealth, countries desperately need companies, because they—unlike most human beings—have the means of production,… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
“One such question revolved around the informal institution of black kids eating together in the cafeteria. I’m going to let you in… — Baratunde Thurston Copy Share Image
“We went into Bennie's, where Ratso bought all three newspapers: the Post, which I always read and Ratso hated, The New York… — Kinky Friedman Copy Share Image
“I tried for a decade not to feel anything,” I said. I didn’t wipe away the tear that broke free. He’d already… — Vee Hoffman Copy Share Image
“The bus had a lavatory in the wayback rear, which no one ever made any attempt to use, and I remember consciously… — David Foster Wallace Copy Share Image
“It's not the concept of marriage I have a problem with. I'd like to get married too. A couple times. It's the… — Chelsea Handler Copy Share Image
At Poltersberg, there is a lake similarly cursed. If you throw a stone into it, a dreadful storm immediately arises, and the… — Martin Luther Copy Share Image
Young stand-ups, we ought to do comedy in George Carlin's spirit, in Richard Pryor's spirit, in Jackie Gleason's spirit, in Lucille Ball's… — Tracy Morgan Copy Share Image
