“Oh, no," Maldynado said. "When I get my statue, I don't want it to be an image of me going up a… — Lindsay Buroker Copy Share Image
Jordan ran the London marathon to help raise money for the blind. After jogging that far with her body, I'm surprised she… — Frankie Boyle Copy Share Image
I love puns. I've been known to turn the car around just to take advantage of a good pun situation. It really… — Karin Slaughter Copy Share Image
Learning French is trivial: the word for horse is cheval, and everything else follows in the same way. — Alan Perlis Copy Share Image
I think comedy should be left up to the professionals, that way everyone's safety is protected. — Greg Proops Copy Share Image
“How long have you been with Raphael?” “You ask a lot of questions for a dead woman.” “What can I say? I… — Nalini Singh Copy Share Image
To move wild laughter in the throat of death? It cannot be; it is impossible: Mirth cannot move a soul in agony. — William Shakespeare Copy Share Image
Here comes a pair of very strange beasts, which in all tongues are called fools. — William Shakespeare Copy Share Image
I love a man with a great sense of humor and who is intelligent - a man who has a great smile.… — Nicole Scherzinger Copy Share Image
I keep doing specials because I think there are a lot of people who make movies and TV who are fans of… — Bill Burr Copy Share Image
There's quite an overlap between musicians - especially drummers - who have an affection and a proclivity towards comedy and comedians who… — David Cross Copy Share Image
“Anyway, the reason I hate communion isn't the meat-eating component. I get hungry enough, I'll eat anything. The reason I hate it… — Pete Hautman Copy Share Image
Then you get these articles about how unhealthy life is in the city. You know; mobile phone tumours - far more likely… — Dylan Moran Copy Share Image
“You have to give an editor something to change, or he gets frustrated. After he pees in it himself, he likes the… — Robert A. Heinlein Copy Share Image
The idea of a musical comedy was something we had had in mind for many years, but the project 'Igudesman & Joo:… — Aleksey Igudesman Copy Share Image
Comedy is a weird thing. You have to understand, it's the weirdest thing you can do. There's no consensus. It's not like...… — Martin Short Copy Share Image
“Joke exchanges are carried on in deadly earnest, like a verbal duel-mouth-to-mouth combat. Bang, bang: you’re (linguistically) dead.” — David Crystal Copy Share Image
“If you do shit gold, Father, find a privy and get busy, he wanted to say, but he knew better. --Tyrion Lannister” — George R.R. Martin Copy Share Image
For making a good comedy film, you need a good writer whose craft can be understood through the time that he takes… — Johnny Lever Copy Share Image
The trend the world over is comedy. People have enough tragedies in their lives. — Priyadarshan Copy Share Image
“If I wanted shit, I would have visited the privy, not asked for an audience with you.” — Kiersten White Copy Share Image
It is incredibly presumptive for somebody who has not yet earned his party's nomination to start speculating about vice presidents. — George W. Bush Copy Share Image
“We made love like two people trying to make love like three people in the trunk of a car. ” — Dark Jar Tin Zoo Copy Share Image
It's both funny and sad which seem to me to be the two basic ingredients of good comedy. — Tony Hancock Copy Share Image
“Fuck the Inners, and fuck their magic Jell-O...Just wearing their fancy arm probably turns you into an asshole,” — James S.A. Corey Copy Share Image
God Almighty Himself must have been hilarious when human beings so mingled iron and water and fire as to make a railroad… — Kurt Vonnegut Copy Share Image
Now if the harvest is over, And the world cold, Give me the bonus of laughter, As I lose hold. — John Betjeman Copy Share Image
I liked comedy, but didn't know it was something you could do for a living. I actually wanted to be an attorney. — Aisha Tyler Copy Share Image
It is just fun to play with [in "Mary and Jane"]. I think our sense of humor tends to go that way. — Harry Elfont Copy Share Image
“gold, gold, gold, gold, gold, gold" 'Is there a chorus?' "Gold, gold, gold, gold, gold".' said Hwel. 'You left out a "gold"… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Un uomo intelligente a volte è costretto a ubriacarsi per passare il tempo tra gli idioti.” — Ernest Hemingway Copy Share Image
“What life could have been and what it actually is, the difference reflects your measure of dumbness” — EverSkeptic Copy Share Image
“Oh... and Bacon Surprise.' REALLY? WHAT IS SO SURPRISING ABOUT BACON? 'I don't know. I suppose it comes as something of a… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“It doesn’t matter what you’ve got in your pants if there is nothing in your brain to connect it to.” — Paul Joannides Copy Share Image
My parents are very straightforward, honest folks. My dad is hilarious, the funniest guy I've ever known. — Steve Doocy Copy Share Image
Whoever said nothing is impossible has never tried slamming a revolving door. — DaniAlla And Her BFF Copy Share Image
The first pitch to Tucker Ashford is grounded into left field. No, wait a minute. It's ball one. Low and outside. — Jerry Coleman Copy Share Image
The overwhelming majority of Americans are possessed of two great qualities a sense of humor and a sense of proportion. — Franklin D. Roosevelt Copy Share Image
The human brain is amazing. It functions 24 hours a day from the time we were born, and only stops when we… — Ritu Ghatourey Copy Share Image
“If you can't read a simple goddam sign and follow one simple goddam instruction then get your fat butt the hell out… — Garrison Keillor Copy Share Image
![“It is just fun to play with [in "Mary and Jane"]. I think our sense of humor tends to go that way.” quote by Harry Elfont](https://sms4smile.com/q/i/2d8/harry-elfont-28944_comedy_it-is-just-fun-to-play-with-in-mary-and_2359435.jpg)
