“Make a concise statement clearly and you should only need to say it once.” — Mary Mihalic Copy Share Image
“He looks me up and down blankly. 'So. No Speedos?' 'I left them in my other bag with my muscle shirts and… — Melissa Keil Copy Share Image
Why is it that it's okay to call a white person "mate" yet it's not okay to call a black guy "primate"? — Frankie Boyle Copy Share Image
Most men hate to shop. That's why the men's department is usually on the first floor of a department store, two inches… — John Wayne Copy Share Image
I think Red Dwarf has definitely matured in this series. It's not a sit-com any more, it's a comedy drama. — Craig Charles Copy Share Image
I hate you but you were always there for me to not make me look ridiculous. I appreciate what you did for… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“You walk a fine line between beautifully macabre and uncharacteristically psychotic.” — Solange nicole Copy Share Image
Like I said, all comedy is based on exaggeration, big or small, whatever you can get away with. — Drew Carey Copy Share Image
“We are loved way more by some of the people who have not contacted us in the last twelve or so months… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
“Sure, I said. But some people would ask, 'How can you expect others to replicate what you're doing here?' What would be… — Paul Farmer & Tracy Kidder Copy Share Image
“He lifted my foot and placed a kiss on the tip of my big toe. That toe had never been kissed in… — John Inman Copy Share Image
“Not enough info makes for a lot of dead cats." "Dead cats?" "You know, 'Curiosity killed the cat.' And I have enough… — Bryan Davis Copy Share Image
I think I knew I was funny in Elementary School. I think most funny people realize it when they're young. It tends… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“I couldn’t help but notice how hot he looked tonight with his strong build lining his t-shirt. He should never cover his… — Victoria H. Smith Copy Share Image
“The forecast was cloudy with extended periods of consciousness, followed by a stitch in my side and a sense of impending doom… — Edward Morris Copy Share Image
Three things that is hard to find in a relationship now days. Intelligence, ambition, a sense of humor someone to laugh with,… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Some people are commended for a giddy kind of good-humor, which is as much a virtue as drunkenness. — Alexander Pope Copy Share Image
I have the humor of a 9-year-old boy, and sometimes I've had laughing fits on-air. — Megyn Kelly Copy Share Image
“How could I resist your charms after I heard you tell that guy you'd cut off his balls and shove them down… — Katee Robert Copy Share Image
But, as my mother used to tell me, two wrongs don't make a right. But I soon figured out that three left… — Jim Hightower Copy Share Image
A Polish man bought a zebra for a pet. What does he call the zebra? Spot! — Henny Youngman Copy Share Image
Humor is an affirmation of dignity, a declaration of man's superiority to all that befalls him. — Romain Gary Copy Share Image
Comedy lives on in the web and TV, but nobody's pressing comedy albums anymore. — Jason Alexander Copy Share Image
I feel both happy and sad in my life... Life is neither comedy nor tragedy. And so I just wanted to work… — Cord Jefferson Copy Share Image
My goal is really to just make people laugh with integrity, like, with something that I still find funny. — Ali Wong Copy Share Image
A lot of people say that comedy doesnt travel well. I found it very accessible. — Mark Addy Copy Share Image
“Watch yourself, Nikolai," Mal said softly. " Princes bleed just like other men.” — Leigh Bardugo Copy Share Image
“The human brain is like a freight car, guaranteed to carry a certain capacity but often running empty.” — Lorraine Gokul Copy Share Image
“Soap?" "School of America in Paris" he explains. "SOAP". Nice. My father sent me here to be cleansed.” — Stephanie Perkins Copy Share Image
“Thank you for that, boy genius! Where did you graduate from? Hogwarts School for the Mentally Unbalanced?” — Leia Shaw Copy Share Image
“I do lend my books, but I have to be a bit selective because my marginalia are so incriminating.” --Alison Bechdel” — Leah Price Copy Share Image
“She told her daughter to never marry for money, the price is too high. But, don't hang out at the trailer park… — Dawn Galland Copy Share Image
Salt is like good-humor, and nearly every thing is better for a pinch of it. — Louisa May Alcott Copy Share Image
I want to help people, give hope to all. Humor is the foundation of our lives. — Terry Bradshaw Copy Share Image
Humor is important for is pacing. If your whole book is just drama drama drama, it's going to wear down the reader. — Patrick Rothfuss Copy Share Image
'Taskmaster' taps into a universal humour of people making a fool of themselves. — Greg Davies Copy Share Image
I would like to explore comedy more. It's not something that I've done a lot of. Obviously, I'm very at home in… — Jessica Pare Copy Share Image
My dad would always say, 'What can you do to make the world a better place?' Well, I can make people laugh. — Jon Lovitz Copy Share Image
My mom watches really obscure stuff on IFC. She's a real comedy fan. She knows everything that's going on. — Kate McKinnon Copy Share Image
How I've fed my kids over the years is by doing stand-up comedy in clubs. — Dominic Holland Copy Share Image
