When times are troubled, SMILE. When disaster threatens, LAUGH. When asked your age, LIE. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
No man's life, liberty, or property are safe while the legislature is in session. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Women and Washing Machines are similar in a way, you have to use your hands in their absence. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
There's nothing better than a good friend, except a good friend with CHOCOLATE. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If laying in my bed for the rest of the day is wrong, then I don't want to be right. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If Mitt Romney wins this years election, I volunteer as tribute for the Hunger Games. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Have you ever wondered if those dollar bills in your wallet might have once been in a strippers butt? You're wondering now... — Anonymous Copy Share Image
In every relationship one must sacrifice to show thy love. Are you willing to make sacrifices for someone you love? — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If you're a girl who raises her voice a lot, I assume your mom didn't hug you enough when you were a… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The Bible tells us to love our neighbors, and also to love our enemies; probably because they are generally the same people. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Laughter is the best medicine, daily dose of laughter keeps you active, your mind fresh and most of all makes you happy. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Sometimes I make my life a living hell by writing complex stories with complex characters. But I love it. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If my name was Mario I'd get into as many relationships as I can just so I could break up with them… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Ya of course we're best friends...You cry I cry, You laugh I laugh, You fall off a bridge I laugh even HARDER.… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“our whole course of life is but matter of laughter: we are not soberly wise; and the world itself, which ought at… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Bronco, The - You start by going doggy style and then just when she is really enjoying it, yougrab her tits as… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I lost a very close friend and drinking partner last week. He got his finger caught in a wedding ring. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If you're talking about me behind my back, you're in the perfect position to kiss my ass. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Pumpkin Spice Lattes are to college girls; what mini-shooters of whiskey are to alcoholics. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I have always suspected skim milk was gay. For god's sake, it has homogenized right on the carton. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Being with her can prove difficult, but life without her would be unbearable.” — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Are all of Taylor Swifts songs about the same guy, or is she just a whore? — Anonymous Copy Share Image
He is a [sane] man who can have tragedy in his heart and comedy in his head. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Oscar Wilde: "I wish I had said that." Whistler: "You will, Oscar; you will.” — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Though we adore men individually, we agree as a group they're rather stupid. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The whole world came crashing down on me, so I got some tape and stuck the map back onto the wall. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when people think theyre funny but they are just annoying. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If you ever get caught sleeping on the job...slowly raise your head and say 'In Jesus name, amen.' — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Eagles may soar, free and proud, but weasels never get sucked into jet engines. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
And a tear rolled down her cheek, as she said goodbye; because she's walking away, and she's never looking back — Anonymous Copy Share
You'll seldom experience regret for anything that you've done. It is what you haven't done that will torment you. The message, therefore, is clear.… — Anonymous Copy Share
Scrabble - The game is available in Braille. That’s a nice fact. This makes me feel better about humanity for some reason. I can’t… — Anonymous Copy Share
“THIS tale of my sore-troubled life I write, To thank the God of nature, who conveyed My soul to me, and with such care… — Anonymous Copy Share
Put on my J's and dance the whole night away Im naughty by nature like Im hip-hop hooray With my hands in the sky,… — Anonymous Copy Share
Me.. I have been through a lot, but I still manage to have a smile on my face. Im not worried about the past… — Anonymous Copy Share
Distance is a test of love. many will fail for those who can't withstand it, but for those who can, theres only one answer… — Anonymous Copy Share
The only person I've ever purposely caused pain here is myself...By simply sharing, caring too much. — Anonymous Copy Share
The truth is, of course, that the curtness of the Ten Commandments is an evidence, not of the gloom and narrowness of a religion,… — Anonymous Copy Share
![“He is a [sane] man who can have tragedy in his heart and comedy in his head.” quote by Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/q/img-quotes/0c5/anonymous-1_comedy_he-is-a-sane-man-who-can-have-tragedy-in_2617430.jpg)
