Hindi SMS section
Tried drawing your portrait as a keepsake to hold close — ended up using it to scare children instead.
Teri yaad mein humne qalam uthaya liya
paper aur tasveer aapki banayi
socha tha k usko dil se laga kar rakhenge
magar
woh to bacho ko daraane ke kaam aayi...
An angry boss asks if you've ever seen an owl, watches you look down, then tells you to look up — and meet one.
Angry boss: Tumne kabhi Ullu dekha hai?
Executive (sar jhukate hue): Nahin sir.
Boss: Niche kya dekh rahe ho ? Meri taraf dekho.
A warm Roman Urdu good night cleverly arguing that if your friend is truly precious, you should keep them awake rather than let them drift off.
Dosti agar buri ho, to use hone mat do,
Ho gayi to use khone mat do,
Aur agar dost ho sabse pyara to use sone mat do,
Jagte raho…
A Sardar lies on train tracks citing a past near-miss with a plane as evidence he's completely invincible.
1 sardar rail ki patri per sogaya.
1 admi ne kaha kia ker raho ho?
Train aayegi tu mar jao gay!
Sardar:Mairy oper se jahaz guzar gaya
tu kuch nahin howa, rail kia cheez hay?
Roman Urdu SMS mapping phone functions onto feelings: inbox for laughter, outbox for tears, hold for anger, vibrate for the heart.
Hansi ko inbox,
Ansu ko outbox,
Ghussay ko hold,
Muskan ko sent,
Help ko OK karo,
Dil ko karo vibrat,
phir dekho zindagi ki ringtone
kitni pyari mehsos ho gi,
A Sardar kid reports a magic trick — bathroom light turns on by itself when he opens the fridge door. Mom immediately knows what happened.
Chota Sardar: Mummy Kal Raati Jadu Hoya.....
Main Bathroom DA darwaja Kholaya Te Light Ap he Jal Paree.
Mummy :Oyeeeeeeee Tu fir Fridge Vich Susu Kar ditaaa
A Sardar is sentenced to a 5am execution and finds it genuinely funny — for a very practical reason.
Police:Tumhe kal subah 5 baje phasi di jayegi.
Sardar: Ha Ha Ha Ha!
Police:Kion has rahe ho?
Sardar:Main to uthta hi subha 9 baje hon.!
hehehe:d
Roman Urdu SMS playing with the letter D for dosti, dil, dillagi, and dard, then warning not to let attachment prevent a text.
D se dosti,
D se dil,
D se dillagi
D se dard.
per D se itna bhi Dil na lagana k
S se sms aur
C se call
bhi na kar sako! samje?
Friendship blessing SMS that curves into a wish for you to do all the work while the sender gets your paycheck.
Anso tumare niklein ankhein meri hon,
Anso tumare niklein ankhein meri hon,
Dil tumara dhadk dhadkane meri hon,
KHUDA KARE,
hamari dosti itni gahri ho,
K
nokri tum karo salary meri ho
Wife tells Sardar to slow the bike because she's scared; he says if she's scared she can just close her eyes like he already has.
Wife:Please bike taze na chalao
mujhey dar lag raha hay.
Sardar: Agar tujhy bhi dar lag raha hay
to meri tarah ankhein band kar lay.:P
Man asks to be made a sardar; doctor removes 90% of his brain by accident; man wakes up and speaks only in English.
Admi:Mujhe sardar bana do
Doc: uske liye tumhara 50% dimagh nikalna parega
Admi: OK
Doctor ne ghalti se 90% nikal dia.
Admi hosh mein aa k bola: Khocha ye tumne kia kar dia.
Roman Urdu SMS listing an ideal woman's qualities — modesty, fragrance of a rose, devotion to prayer, and service to parents.
1 bat bataon RAAZ ki,
karo us larki se "AASHQI",
Jis k chehre pe ho "SAADGI",
Sanso mai ho "TAAZGI",
Chandni ho "CHAND ki,
Rani ho "RAAT" ki,
Khushbo ho "GULAB" ki,
Batein kare "PYAR" ki,
Nazuk ho "MIZAJ" ki,
Achi ho "IKHLAQ" ki,
Pabund ho "NAMAZ" ki,
Khidmat kare "MAA,BAAP" ki,
Or hamesha kahe!
"MAIN HON SIRF AAP KI"