Quote by Jarod Kintz Download Open image ““I’ve got washboard abs. Go ahead, get rid of your dishwasher.”” — Jarod Kintz ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ 4.9 out of 5 (9 ratings) Copy quoteShare
“There was no room for unhappiness when squeezed between two sets of washboard abs. New life motto, right there.” — Cora Carmack Copy Share Image
“It takes a lot more than washboard abs and a giant . . .” Crap. Something else… Ego. To get my attention” — Nicole Williams Copy Share Image
“On the table beside me is a book entitled Love’s Desperate Desire. Based on the cover, I would have called it My Spectacular Washboard… — Rick Yancey Copy Share Image
“You emptied the top rack of the dishwasher but not the bottom, so the clean dishes have gotten all mixed up with the dirty… — Lorrie Moore Copy Share Image
As I bent over the washboard and looked at my arms buried in soapsuds, I said to myself, 'What are you going to do… — Madam C. J. Walker Copy Share Image
“I want to take a sponge bath, but first I need to take that sponge and wash the dishes so I can fit my… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“If you were to stack up all the stupid things I’ve done, you couldn’t clean them with a thousand dishwashers.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Running the dishwasher is all well and good, but if your sink is accumulating a mountain of dirty dishes because your clean ones are… — Rachel Hoffman Copy Share Image
“I’m one washing machine away from throwing in the towel. But I’m not a quitter. I’m also out of laundry detergent.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“By day I’m a dishwasher in a suit. By night I’m a dishwasher in pajamas.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“The only place I didn’t sweep was under her dress. But that’s what the dishwasher is for.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I notice when you’re gone. Or do I? How can I observe something that isn’t there?” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A blanket could be used to make sweet, sweet music with the love of your life. Hopefully that person is me, because I’ve been… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A brick could be used to slow down time. Sort of like a camel in a wheelchair pushed by a thirsty Arab. Hey, Khalid,… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“We have a love so pure that it makes snow seem yellow. (Don’t eat it!)” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I hid Mrs. Frozenwater’s body in the ice cube trays in my freezer. Better to keep her there than let her memory thaw out… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Two similar words might lead to two similar ideas. They might also lead to the basement, which I recently converted into a dungeon/torture chamber.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Nothing is and isn’t; nothing is and isn’t—nothing itself is, and at the same time, nothing isn’t.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“There’s only one piece of clothing I could eat fast, and that’s a scarf.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Dora J. Arod is to Jarod Ora, as yes is to yes. Yes is also the correct answer to “Will you marry me?” Other… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“The best part about being kidnapped is being blindfolded and getting kicked into the trunk of a car. Boy, normally I have to beg… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
