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Humor Quote by Brenda Ueland

“In fact that is why the lives of most women are so vaguely unsatisfactory. They are always doing secondary and menial things (that do not require all their gifts and ability) for others and never anything for themselves. Society and husbands praise them for it (when they get too miserable or have…” quote by Brenda Ueland
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““In fact that is why the lives of most women are so vaguely unsatisfactory. They are always doing secondary and menial things (that do not require all their gifts and ability) for others and never anything for themselves. Society and husbands praise them for it (when they get too miserable or have nervous breakdowns) though always a little perplexedly and half-heartedly and just to be consoling. The poor wives are reminded that that is just why wives are so splendid -- because they are so unselfish and self-sacrificing and that is the wonderful thing about them! But inwardly women know that something is wrong. They sense that if you are always doing something for others, like a servant or nurse, and never anything for yourself, you cannot do others any good. You make them physically more comfortable. But you cannot affect them spiritually in any way at all. For to teach, encourage, cheer up, console, amuse, stimulate or advise a husband or children or friends, you have to be something yourself. [...]"If you would shut your door against the children for an hour a day and say; 'Mother is working on her five-act tragedy in blank verse!' you would be surprised how they would respect you. They would probably all become playwrights.””

Brenda Ueland

About This Quote

Source Essay: “The Women's Problem” by Brenda Ueland, 1932

Women often sacrifice their own growth to serve others, leading to unfulfilling lives and limited spiritual impact on those they help.

In simple terms: Self‑sacrifice can block personal development and deeper influence.

Key Takeaway

Cultivate personal passions alongside caring for others.

Themes

self‑sacrifice identity fuliritual influence gender roles

Mood

reflective determined

Type

advice motivational

When to use this quote

  • family caregiving
  • career development
  • creative pursuits
  • personal hobbies

Key Concepts

self‑actualization service balance

Questions to Reflect On

  • How can you honor your own needs without neglecting loved ones?
  • What personal passions could you nurture today?
A Different Perspective

Self‑care may be seen as selfish, causing guilt or conflict with expectations.

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