All Joan Rivers Quotes
- I am never honored. My career is hilarious to me. I am either under the radar or over the radar. Career
- I hate old people, I hate children. I think any celebrity that adopts a child from a third world country is a fool. Adopt
- I live very well, but I support a lot of relatives. Live
- I love the Internet, and I love that you can say whatever you want. Internet
- My audiences get younger all the time. All
- I think I was the third person in the world to get a Kindle, and I hated it from the minute I got it. From
- Prince Charles is so funny. So, so funny. Charles
- You hear things about certain people. When you hear someone was mean to a limo driver or a wardrobe lady, or someone was rotten to… Brain
- My eyes opened, and the first thing I thought of when I could put thoughts together was I want to be in show business. Never… Anything Else
- Any comic is a very good actor. Look at Don Rickles. He is saying the same joke every night for 20 years and making it… Actor
- As comedians, we are all laughing because life is so horrible. Life is so difficult, and I cope with it by making jokes about absolutely… Absolutely
- I will work as hard as I do because I love it. Hard
- My career is as an actress. I am an actress playing a comedienne. Actress
- I get butterflies before I go out to say hello at a party. Butterflies
- Reading should be a pleasure, not a chore. Chore
- Your child is never not your child. You can be 90 and your mother 120, but your mother is still worried about you. Child
- I love Vines. You make this 6.4-second drama, and you can reach 6 million viewer, and make people laugh. I find it so fabulous. Drama
- What makes me laugh is, of course, the absurd, the horror - anything that upsets me. Absurd
- Life does not measure up to performing... Performing is perfect. Life
- I just love acting. Acting
- I was a Brownie Scout mother. Brownie
- I am furious about everything. Furious
- I have become my own version of an optimist. If I can't make it through one door, I'll go through another door - or I'll… Another Door
- Is she fat? Her favorite food is seconds Fat
- I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was, 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath'. For three… All