President Obama will be going to Disney World where he'll unveil his new plan to create jobs. And what better place for… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
The Bush administration has apparently approved a plan to oust Saddam Hussein. I think that's President Bush's Father's Day gift to his… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
According to CNN, Donald Rumsfeld said the war in Iraq did not go according to plan. And President Bush said, 'What? We… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Rick Perry unveiled his new tax plan. He says he wants a flat tax. He believes that tax should be flat, just… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
CNN said that after the war, there is a plan to divide Iraq into three parts: regular, premium and unleaded. — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
According to USA Today, 74 percent of Americans plan to hand out candy this Halloween. Although President Obama thinks it should be… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Senator John Kerry released his plan today to eliminate the deficit. He said all we have to do is find a really… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Some Democrats say the estimated $60 billion dollar cost of a war with Iraq could be better spent at home. When he… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
The White House has finally found one guy that kinda remembers serving with President Bush in the National Guard. Now they just… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
President Bush announced tonight that he believes in democracy and that democracy can exist in Iraq. They can have a strong economy,… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Con artists are using Obamacare confusion to sign people up for fake health insurance. The scammers lure victims with false promises like,… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
President Bush announced a major new plan for the United States to put a man on the moon, which would be a… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
For years President Obama has been saying that no one would lose their healthcare plan. Now the White House has admitted that… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
People made a big deal out of the fact this is the first time a sitting president has done a late-night show.… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
As you know President Bush has been traveling around the country trying to sell his new Social Security plan. He wants to… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
House Speaker John Boehner says President Obama should have clearly outlined his exact plans before bombing Libya. Apparently it's only Iraq where… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Senator Chris Dodd unveiled his plan to reduce corruption in the Senate. He's retiring. — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Heating bills this winter are the highest they've been in five years, but President Bush has a plan to combat rising bills.… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Saddam Hussein has raised the amount going to suicide bombers from $10 thousand dollars to $25 thousand. What's next, a health care plan? — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
President Obama said he plans on training 10,000 new math and science teachers. How about teaching math to that economic team of his? — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
In an unlikely pairing, Hillary Clinton made an appearance this week with Newt Gingrich to push a health care plan. The press… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Last night, John McCain said that under the Democratic health care plan, a bureaucrat would stand between you and your doctor, as… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
President Obama admitted this week that a former girlfriend that he wrote about in his autobiography was made up and not a… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
President Obama was in Disney World today where he unveiled his new plan to create jobs. He was joined by Mickey Mouse… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
The Democratic Leadership Council has named Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton to design a plan to help define an agenda to the Democratic… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
If you restore a car, and you're making money, then you're doing it wrong. — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Bush reiterated his stand to conservatives opposing his decision on stem cell research. He said today he believes life begins at conception and ends… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
There is a nationwide shortage of drugs for Attention Deficit Disorder. The FDA says they're not sure how it happened. I guess somebody wasn't… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
“Leno said the rainy weather in California "couldn't have come at a worse possible time. Today was the day NBC was supposed to burn… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Donald Trump said he will not decide about a possible run for the presidency until after the current season of Celebrity Apprentice wraps up.… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
American forces in Iraq found $650 million in American cash sealed in a hidden cottage. See, this is why President Bush wants to invade… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
I wanted to have a career in sports when I was young, but I had to give up the idea. I'm only six feet… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Texas Gov. Rick Perry referred to the Mexican city of Juarez as the most dangerous city in America. In his defense, he probably just… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
You can tell you ate too much for Thanksgiving when you have to let your bathrobe out. — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
The Mayans have predicted the world is supposed to end on December 21. If the world doesn't end on December 21, you can bet… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
The Globe reports that North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Il raises money by selling fake Viagra pills. What it is about this guy? None of… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
