“The dweam of wuv wapped wiffin the gweater dweam of everwasting west. Eternity is our fwiend, wemember that, and wuv wiw fowwow… — William Goldman Copy Share Image
...it is not necessary to the child to awaken to the sense of the strange and humorous by giving a man a… — Gilbert K. Chesterton Copy Share Image
“Scott had some sort of power, or force field. In essence, he was like fucking gay guy repellant. Not a single gay… — Jayson James Copy Share Image
Bel Air, I am convinced, was laid out by some diabolic sadist who deliberately decided not to use a compass or a… — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
“Something can be humorous without being funny. The difference is when it’s humorous, a person says, “That’s funny,” and when it’s funny,… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
Unless you're writing for a humorous effect, elves or space aliens and all creatures who aren't human should at least be as… — Will Shetterly Copy Share Image
The Democrats believe that if God did not want them to raise taxes, He would not have created the Internal Revenue Service. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
The fact that Americans drag around the world by the busloads to glimpse the past probably has something to do with the… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
“With a regrettable sigh he shook his head. "I'm sorry, but this isn't going to work out." "What the hell are you… — R.L. Mathewson Copy Share Image
“Are you calling us pigs?’ Froi asked, watching as Rafuel winced for the tenth time at the formality of Froi’s Charyn.Rafuel thought… — Melina Marchetta Copy Share Image
College football is a game which would be much more interesting if the faculty played instead of the students, and even more… — H. L. Mencken Copy Share Image
“There is a safety mechanism in place [to ensure the perambulator doesn't turn back into a purse with a baby in it]… — Lev A.C. Rosen Copy Share Image
“Thanks,” I muttered and added under my breath, “Douchebag.” He laughed, deep and throaty. “Now that’s not very ladylike, Kittycat.” I whipped… — Jennifer L. Armentrout Copy Share Image
“Buy potatoes,” he said. “Gotta hop.” Then he hung up. Of course. A cloud of fallout would threaten European food and water… — Michael Lewis Copy Share Image
“I have considered the impudent accusations of Mr Dawkins with exasperation at his lack of serious scholarship. He has apparently not read… — Richard Dawkins Copy Share Image
“I nod and smile and smile and nod, and when she turns away, I form a gun with my hand, place it… — Victoria Scott Copy Share Image
“The night before a deadline, I usually am in desperate need of a back rub. And new wrists. And candy. And little… — Christy Hall Copy Share Image
“I mumble my vows, Shad mutters his, and I wonder what would happen if I lunged for the door like a wild… — Janet Mullany Copy Share Image
“A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush, unless it is the burning bush, in that case the value… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
A member of the committee slapped a name tag over my left bosom. "What shall we name the other one?" I smiled.… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
I've heard Eric Clapner, ... I think it was a wonderful thing that Eric Clapner the musician did...So I think that's the… — Joycelyn Elders Copy Share Image
“I decided right then and there to make a snickerdoodle perfume to wear, so that one day he would sniff me like… — Jessica Verday Copy Share Image
... Take another glass of wine, and excuse my mentioning that society as a body does not expect one to be so… — Charles Dickens Copy Share Image
The act, when vacuuming, of running over a string at least a dozen times, reaching over and picking it up, examining it,… — Rich Hall Copy Share Image
“White? That's good. virginal. He'll be reminded this is a first for you and hopefully won't just impale you on his pork… — Carmen Jenner Copy Share Image
“A friend told me that one day he and I would be rich and famous. I told him that I'd trade my… — Quentin R. Bufogle Copy Share Image
Poetry, I think, intensifies the reader's experience. If it's a humorous facet of the story, poetry makes it more exuberant. If it's… — Vikram Seth Copy Share Image
“This isn't sex." I blinked. "Oh. Then what is it?" "An emergency!" I started to argue and then thought twice about it.… — Karen Chance Copy Share Image
Long before the word Zionism was uttered for the first time, old religious Jews came from all over the world to die… — George Mikes Copy Share Image
“Holy hell," Shawn whispered, his eyes glued to Ziang's front. Particularly to what Ziang didn't have between his legs. "Dude, where's your… — M.A. Church Copy Share Image
I mean you've got a conservative and right-winged press presence with really nothing on the other end of the political spectrum. — Hillary Clinton Copy Share Image
If Jesus Christ were to come today, people would not even crucify him. They would ask him to dinner, and hear what… — Thomas Carlyle Copy Share Image
“Babcock silenced himself when he caught a gratifying sight on the broker’s shelf—his finance book, Moving Ones and Zeros Around like a… — Jasun Ether Copy Share Image
“As an unavoidable result of the inevitable loss of some physical and/or some mental abilities, many a man who has been alive… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
“Like every other good thing in this world, leisure and culture have to be paid for. Fortunately, however, it is not the… — Aldous Huxley Copy Share Image
Earnest is our dog. She senses instantly that something is wrong, and guided by that timeless and unerring nurturing instinct that all… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
We need time to relax and enjoy ourselves too, no matter how dark the story. The occasional humorous moment helps with that.… — Patrick Rothfuss Copy Share Image
I don't understand why prostitution is illegal, Selling is legal, f***ing is legal. So why isn't it legal to sell f***ing? Why… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
He had that rare weird electricity about him - that extremely wild and heavy presence that you only see in a person… — Hunter S. Thompson Copy Share Image
“Death, taxes and childbirth! There's never any convenient time for any of them. ― Margaret Mitchell, Gone with the Wind” — Anonymous Copy Share Image
![“There is a safety mechanism in place [to ensure the perambulator doesn't turn back into a purse with a baby in it] : if anything weighing more than a pound and a half-about the weight of a three-volume novel-is in the carriage of the perambulator, it will not transform.” quote by Lev A.C. Rosen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/801/lev-a-c-rosen-43522_humorous_there-is-a-safety-mechanism-in-place-to_937560.jpg)
