You know your addicted to facebook when you keep looking if anyone likes your status... — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I was arrested after my therapist suggested I take something for my kleptomania. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Just because the seasons are changing doesnt mean your bikini profile picture has to. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Texting while driving: yolo Forever alone: SOLO Marco: POLO Condom broke: OHNO You like men: HOMO Bitches crazy: FOSHO Run n!gga run:… — Patience Copy Share Image
I Followed you, I starred you, I retweeted you, I DM'ed you, I lost you, I blocked you, I never wanna see… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Do you want to make money from Facebook? It's easy. Just go to your Account Setting, Deactivate your account, and Go To… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Taylor Swift waved at a boy yesterday and he didn't wave back...So she will have a new album coming out tomorrow. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Warning going to sleep on sunday will cause monday. Please note that staying awake all night does not prevent monday there is… — Ritu Ghatourey Copy Share Image
HUSBAND, FAITHFUL, That man who is married to a trusting wife (a definition that can be either truthful or cynical) — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Teen: Has sex, does drugs, bad grades Parent: Just don't do it again! ok? Teen: Doesn't do chores. Parent: YOU CHILD ARE… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The only reason the laundrette on Albert Square in Eastenders is open is because none of the people on there can figure… — Sparki Dee Copy Share Image
Every father thinks that his son is an idiot, but only my dad is right. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
The Titanic is a great lesson of why just the tip can get you in a lot of trouble. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Dear Jesus, I can afford wine. How about you start turning water into gas? — Anonymous Copy Share Image
You know what's fun? Go to a German restaurant and insist on using chopsticks. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Animal testing is a terrible idea. They get nervous and give the wrong answers. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
LIKE if u ever heard a person say I dont live here BUT but their 90% of the timeà — IG:caonte_2_funny Copy Share Image
Can I take your picture?? I love to collect pictures of natural disasters — Hussein Nishah Copy Share Image
Site Engineer is one who thinks single woman can deliver nine babies in one month. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I fake sleep when my family members come in my room so they dont talk to me — Anonymous Copy Share Image
