I think the most important thing about learning comedy is to start from who you are. If you begin the process by… — Rita Rudner Copy Share Image
“The cab driver is staring at me in his mirror. I'm talking to myself. "The second sign of madness," I explain. "What's… — Michael Robotham Copy Share Image
“...Don't be surprised, and I say it darkly, do not be surprised if you lose your Luke in this cause; perhaps Mrs.… — Shirley Jackson Copy Share Image
“Oh, my God, you smiled! Mr. American Frown actually smiled!" "Must have been a mistake. I'll speak to someone about it. Won't… — Sophie Kinsella Copy Share Image
“A demonic reaper asked to be my valentine and then killed his crazy ex-girlfriend to save my life. Tomorrow I was starting… — Courtney Allison Moulton Copy Share Image
“[Reverend James] Dobson says that the [Spongebob Squarepants] video would be watched by millions of elementary school students and includes a reference… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“You are your mother's trueborn son of Lannister." "Am I?" the dwarf replied, sardonic. "Do tell my lord father. My mother died… — George R.R. Martin Copy Share Image
“Could we go into your room?" she asked. "I knew it. I knew it," he said, spinning around and sliding quickly toward… — Arthur C. Clarke Copy Share Image
Your chemistry with your co-actors is more important in a comedy. You can't leave it to your performance alone. So many things… — Tabu Copy Share Image
“Boys are found everywhere- on top of, underneath, inside of, climbing on, swinging from, running around or jumping to. Mothers love them,… — Alan Beck Copy Share Image
Germans are flummoxed by humor, the Swiss have no concept of fun, the Spanish think there is nothing at all ridiculous about… — Bill Bryson Copy Share Image
I'm probably a lot closer than perhaps the contents of my early fiction suggest to a jaded Denny's waitress with smoker's-lung-black humor… — Karen Russell Copy Share Image
“At moments like this he suspected that Hitler had been nothing but a harried bureaucrat and Satan himself a mental defective with… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“It was how it had been with the madman among the tombs, that their number was legion, far in excess at any… — Kem Nunn Copy Share Image
Now, I meant to talk about something else earlier on, and I've forgotten what it was. I've remembered what it is again,… — Dylan Moran Copy Share Image
It's not hard for me to be funny in front of people, but most of that is just horrified nerves taking the… — Lynda Barry Copy Share Image
What is it that strikes a spark of humor from a man? It is the effort to throw off, to fight back… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“What’s the biggest problem facing teenagers today? Ourselves. We’re a generation of lazy underachievers who need to learn that hard work pays… — Nadria Tucker Copy Share Image
“...nobody belongs to that world...Nobody feels as if they belong, at any rate. They're all watching each other--fearful of the laughter coming… — Meredith Duran Copy Share Image
I performed for the U.S. troops in Guantanamo Bay. And signed autographs for people who've been gone from America for so long… — Mike Birbiglia Copy Share Image
“But I was starving! You know I always forget my lunch—and who expects me to concentrate on Advanced Manga Drawing Level 2… — Tiffany Fulton Copy Share Image
“I have to share a room. I am expected to sleep mere meters from a woman whose mental ailment is unknown to… — Emily Austin Copy Share Image
“Martha spouted off a long message to the gnome, including all the details of my injuries, precisely where I was, and who… — Liesl Shurtliff Copy Share Image
“Is there anything you want to do before we put our heads in plastic boxes for two days?' I thought about this… — Tom Francis Copy Share Image
I made $3,000 opening for the Neville Brothers, and they paid me in cash. That was a bad situation, because I bought… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
My mother and my father are both very funny people, and they're both artistic in their own right. Oftentimes, we get very… — Lulu Wang Copy Share Image
“I once gave my friend his braille book to him upside down and I got a punch in the shoulder. He was… — Haresh Daswani Copy Share Image
I think I'm not uber into the comedy scene, but I love to laugh, especially in our business, where you're always front… — John Cena Copy Share Image
“Ly-di-ah! I sit beneath your window, laaaass, singing ’cause I loooove your a—” “For the love of St. Francis of Assisi, someone… — Michelle M. Pillow Copy Share Image
“Mom stood over the still thrashing ghost with the bat and brought it down on its head again and again. "Leave him… — C.A. Marshall Copy Share Image
“Straightening, I asked, "What do you believe in?" "Old love songs, best friends, the collected works of J.R.R.Tolkien, crispy pork egg rolls… — Cynthia Leitich Smith Copy Share Image
“Not that I'm complaining. It was better than my old dream, where Harma Dogshead was feeding me to her pigs." "Harma's dead."… — George R.R. Martin Copy Share Image
“When the Italian poet Dante described the center of hell in his poem The Divine Comedy, he got it wrong. The epicenter… — Steve Dublanica Copy Share Image
“You're the kind of child who might develop a passion for Bach." I told him I hadn't at school. The one Bach… — Dodie Smith Copy Share Image
“Listen closely...this is the most important thing you need to know while you're here. Do not eat the haddock. They've been overcooking… — Veronica Rossi Copy Share Image
When people say, 'How did you start in comedy,' I say my family was kidnapped by ninjas when I was very young,… — Hannibal Buress Copy Share Image
“I turned up the inane sound effects and let them fill the room, setting up an atmosphere of mind-body pollution while Miss… — Alice Yi-Li Yeh Copy Share Image
“There was an old Taoist who lived in a village in ancient China, named Master Hu. Hu loved God and God loved… — David James Duncan Copy Share Image
My mother comes in my room and says, "Just look at this mess! This is a pig sty!" Now, I've already been… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
“The noisy jay swoops by and reviles me, he complains of my meow and my malingering. I too am not a bit… — Henry N. Beard Copy Share Image
![“[Reverend James] Dobson says that the [Spongebob Squarepants] video would be watched by millions of elementary school students and includes a reference to being 'tolerant of differences.' The nerve! Who does Spongebob think he is? Jesus Christ? Tolerance will not be, uh, tolerated. Oh, and…” quote by Celia Rivenbark](https://sms4smile.com/q/i/6d4/celia-rivenbark-15261_elementary-school_reverend-james-dobson-says-that-the-spon_2910992.jpg)
