“OK, I confess. I Googled him once. Maybe twice. Oh, all right, so I've lost count over the years. But so what?… — Alexandra Potter Copy Share Image
“You can't give her that!' she screamed. 'It's not safe!' IT'S A SWORD, said the Hogfather. THEY'RE NOT MEANT TO BE SAFE.… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Morpheus places his hand on Jeb's busy fingers, eyes opened to slits. "Ah, my pretty pseudo elf." He takes labored breath. "is… — A.G. Howard Copy Share Image
“...every year for decades there had been great excitement over the Largest Vegetable competition ("That would be my husband", was the standard… — G.M. Malliet Copy Share Image
“At any rate," she prattled on, awkwardness making her words run together, "I really can't get up to get my clothing, and… — Julia Quinn Copy Share Image
Man went into a bar, he only had one arm. Guy sitting next to him said 'Hey, you've got your sleeve in… — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
“It came charging toward me, several hundred pounds of angry-looking monster, and I did the only thing any reasonable wizard could have… — Jim Butcher Copy Share Image
“Leo,” Jason said, “you’re weird.” “Yeah, you tell me that a lot.” Leo grinned. “But if you don’t remember me, that means… — Rick Riordan Copy Share Image
“Be not fickle with your riddles, Alasír,” she said. “You and I both suspect the same thing. Someone has been out here… — Jacob D. Lochner Copy Share Image
I visited Jobs for the last time in his Palo Alto, Calif., home. He had moved to a downstairs bedroom because he… — Walter Isaacson Copy Share Image
Humor is everything. Everything. Usually the negatives turned out to be the most positive for me. In the music industry, any other… — Pitbull Copy Share Image
“We must truly listen to each other, respecting our essential brotherhood and the courage of those who try to speak, however they… — Eugene England Copy Share Image
The one thing that makes 'Torchwood' work so brilliantly and makes it a little bit above the rest of all other sci-fi… — John Barrowman Copy Share Image
I'm interested not just in projects that I'll be starring in, but producing film and TV that's really quality and great for… — Lance Reddick Copy Share Image
“At first he found it amusing. He coined a law intended to have the humor of a Parkinson’s law that "The number… — Robert Pirsig Copy Share Image
When I first started doing my stand-up act, I played the banjo, did comedy, magic tricks, juggled, read poetry. I stuck it… — Steve Martin Copy Share Image
“...Stella’s tiny butt stuck in the air as she stretched to reach a weed. She was wearing a pair of jeans and… — Robin Alexander Copy Share Image
When I do comedy, my brain sort of locks up in the infinite possibilities. That's where I get sort of lost. I… — Ryan Reynolds Copy Share Image
“You sure you don't want to go?” Grandma Mazur asked my mother. “I didn't know Moogey Bues,” my mother told her. “I've… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
“When answering the question "Who won?" "Peter. Damn mutant cyborg. He can run the fastest. I guess that's a good thing, since… — Joey W. Hill Copy Share Image
I wrote a song, but I can't read music so I don't know what it is. Every once in a while I'll… — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
“Warning: Contains old friends, old enemies, a dramatic cat rescue, soft drink references and a lot of teasing before the steamy sex.… — K.A. Mitchell Copy Share Image
“You think you’re a pretty funny guy, don’t you?” “Well, I don’t want to brag…” “You know what’s really funny?” Geryon asks,… — Dark Calling Copy Share Image
I think comedy and satire are a very important part of democracy, and it's important we are able to laugh at the… — Rory Bremner Copy Share Image
“Smartass Disciple: Master, do you really believe in the second chance? Master of Stupidity: That supports the basis of lost-then-found concept.” — Toba Beta Copy Share Image
“Zane raised his brow. “Didn’t I say that yesterday?” he asked, forcing himself to be patient. Somehow. “You say that like you… — Abigail Roux & Madeleine Urban Copy Share Image
When I was 10 there wasnt trampolines and cartoon charaters, I never went to Chuck E Cheese! My mom said ' you… — George Lopez Copy Share Image
So there I was lying in the gutter. A man stopped and asked '"What's the matter? Did you fall over?" So I… — Chic Murray Copy Share Image
Be strong, believe in freedom and in God, love yourself, understand your sexuality, have a sense of humor, masturbate, don't judge people… — Madonna Ciccone Copy Share Image
We sit in a room, laugh, and all come up with comedy situations, which we work out. Sometimes we cross the line,… — Joe Gatto Copy Share Image
I try to look on the sunny side of life. If something dramatic happens to me, I always try to recount it… — Suzanne Shaw Copy Share Image
When people make their usernames be like a cruse word , calling themself sexy ,and what not you gotta wonder what are… — MrCountry Copy Share Image
“Adam's response was buried in the sound of the first-story door falling open. Noah slouched in. In a wounded tone, he said,… — Maggie Stiefvater Copy Share Image
The people I grew up around who I really liked were quick on the draw. It always just wowed me. And my… — Drew Barrymore Copy Share Image
“How I should despise such a thing if I were a man. What a nose she has! what a chin! what a… — John Vanbrugh Copy Share Image
“You know, the most amazing thing happened to me tonight... I saw a car with the license plate ARW 357. Can you… — Richard P. Feynman Copy Share Image
It feels amazing to just be here and be able to share my jokes with the world. It's not so much about… — Iliza Shlesinger Copy Share Image
I have spiritual beliefs that I could literally go out and make an entire comedy routine about, and tour as some sort… — Jim Carrey Copy Share Image
“Most people assumed Aaron was gay just because he was on the cheerleading squad. I, on the other hand, assumed a guy… — Stacey Jay Copy Share Image
TV is easier: it's all planned out for you and the audience is there to see a show and they are all… — Drew Carey Copy Share Image
![“I have spiritual beliefs that I could literally go out and make an entire comedy routine about, and tour as some sort of spiritual guru, but it kind of goes against that [as] I actually believe the things, so I'm always kind of caught in the middle.” quote by Jim Carrey](https://sms4smile.com/q/i/90d/jim-carrey-1172_belief_i-have-spiritual-beliefs-that-i-could-li_2847008.jpg)
