CHICKENS: The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
“What's a wingding? Why, a wingding is, uh...it's just like a shindig but without all the hullabaloo.” — Cuthbert Soup Copy Share Image
The closest thing you will ever come to a brain storm is a light drizzle. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
He's turned his life around. He used to be depressed and miserable. Now he's miserable and depressed. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I'm actually a thin serious person but I play fat and funny, but only for the movies. — Dom DeLuise Copy Share Image
This book is dedicated to all of my friends who helped me get to where I am today - you know who… — Lewis Black Copy Share Image
A drug is not bad. A drug is a chemical compound. The problem comes in when people who take drugs treat them… — Frank Zappa Copy Share Image
I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
We were told four years ago that 17 million people went to bed hungry every night. Well, that was probably true. They… — Ronald Reagan Copy Share Image
I'm somebody who believes, which is kind of funny because I'm cynical, that you can be in love with someone you met… — Maisie Peters Copy Share Image
I have watched all the work going on there, and the more I see of it the more I am convinced that… — Ernest MacBride Copy Share Image
I've had countless reviews sort that have made me cry. It's funny, it doesn't ever get better either; you can't turn your… — Eleanor Catton Copy Share Image
I want to be part of movies that have important and interesting subjects but are not depressing and are rather satirical and… — Terence Lewis Copy Share Image
Happy Mother's Day to someone whom I'm even more dependent on now than when I was in utero. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I would rather undergo a vasectomy via Weed Whacker than attend an opera. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
The day I am afraid to do, that is the day I am no longer fit to lead. — Nelson Mandela Copy Share Image
“I had a dream about you last night... You tried to propose with a digital ceramic heater.” — Amy Summers Copy Share Image
Some may say that I couldn't sing, but no one can say that I didn't sing. — Florence Foster Jenkins Copy Share Image
“Annabeth dies, trying to keep her boyfriend, the Son of Poseidon, from drowning.” — Rick Riordan Copy Share Image
I feel very humble, but I think I have the strength of character to fight it. — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
Diapers And Politicians Should Be Changed Often Both For The Same Reason. Makes Perfect Sense. — Pacifiersucker Copy Share Image
Girls work on their looks but not on their minds because they know boys are stupid, not blind. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
You're one of the few people I don't mind very briefly communicating with on a Monday. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
It's better to spend money like there's no tomorrow than to spend tonight like there's no money. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
'Married with Children' was racy. It was sexist. It was a lot of things, but mostly it was funny. — Katey Sagal Copy Share Image
Do not be afraid of mistakes, provided you do not make the same one twice. — Eleanor Roosevelt Copy Share Image
It cannot be when the root is neglected that what springs from it will be well ordered. — Confucius Copy Share Image
I don't know (if they were men or women running naked across the field). They had bags over their heads. — Yogi Berra Copy Share Image
Never buy a stock immediately after a substantial rise or sell one immediately after a substantial drop. — Benjamin Graham Copy Share Image
