It is possible to have good manners and be funny at the same time. Ronnie Barker and I proved that. — Ronnie Corbett Copy Share Image
You'll live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
It was not my class of people. There was not a producer, a press agent, a director, an actor. — Zsa Zsa Gabor Copy Share Image
Romeo and Juliet killed themselves for their love, so I think you can at least answer my text message. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Life is like a Ferrari, it goes too fast. But that's ok, because you can't afford it anyway!.. — Jim Davis Copy Share Image
Dear Diet, Things just aren't going to work between us. It's not me, it's you. You're tasteless, boring and I cant stand… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
People don't want to listen to a celebrity tweeting about their charities and shows. That's why comedy writers do well - we… — Mindy Kaling Copy Share Image
To go from working with a group of people in a sketch-comedy show on a small network, where it was all about… — Ken Marino Copy Share Image
This nigga Magic Johnson own a basketball team, baseball team nd a movie theatre.. Fuck kind of Aids he got???? FINANCIAL AIDS??? — Deon Crockett Copy Share Image
It's a funny thing, 'The Office,' because millions and millions and millions and millions of people didn't watch it. But culturally, it… — Martin Freeman Copy Share Image
I look at her boobs, and she looks at my dick, and that's when I realize the best things in life are… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I don't really think about things too much, but people are going to form impressions about you if you play football, aren't… — Jimmy Bullard Copy Share Image
Like with 'Parks and Recreation,' it's so much fun because the people writing it are funny and they're open and you just… — Aziz Ansari Copy Share Image
All artists are constantly looking for something and they don't always know what. — Jacob Lawrence Copy Share Image
“I’m waiting with baited breath to hear that silver tongue of yours.” — Jodie B. Cooper Copy Share Image
The place where I had freedom most was when I painted. I was completely and utterly myself. — Alice Neel Copy Share Image
Whatsapp would be a disaster if its ''last seen at'' is changed to ''last seen with — Ritu Ghatourey Copy Share Image
I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck — W. C. Fields Copy Share Image
Our power comes not from suppressing others but from uplifting them. — Sakyong Mipham Copy Share Image
Seeing a guy after the summer and thinking DAMN PUBERTY DID SOME GOOD STUFF FOR HIM — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Ask a SUCCESSFUL person HOW TO FINISH… But always, Ask an EXPERIENCED person HOW TO START — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Sylvester Stallone is very funny and he's a great guy to hang out with. — Eric Roberts Copy Share Image
When they were naming the animals, somebody got lazy: anteater? What's it doing? It's eating ants. DONE! — Demetri Martin Copy Share Image
When I go to a bar, I don't go looking for a girl who knows the capital of Maine. — David Brenner Copy Share Image
The funny thing about bowl recipes is, despite how simple they might seem, they can actually be a lot of work. — Chris Morocco Copy Share Image
Whatever energy you put out there, that's the energy you're going to get back. — Elie Tahari Copy Share Image
Math teacher: I have 5 bottles in one hand, and 6 in the other. What do I have? Student: A drinking problem. — Babloo Copy Share Image
Never trust people who smile constantly. They're either selling something or not very bright. — Laurell K. Hamilton Copy Share Image
Live nutty. Just occasionally. Just once in a while. And see what happens. It brightens up the day. — Leo Buscaglia Copy Share Image
Money is not my business; my thinking is my business. I don't have any other business. — Byron Katie Copy Share Image
