In an argument; Men use reason and never have enough. Women use emotion and always have too much. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Even her pink bunny slippers seem to prick up their ears. Diary of a Penguin-napper (p. 15)” — Sally Harris Copy Share Image
My creativity comes from an unhoned place, if 'unhoned' is a word… — Monica Lewinsky Copy Share Image
Oh, I could spend my life having this conversation - look - please try to understand before one of us dies — John Cleese Copy Share Image
When we understand our relationship to God, we also understand our relationship to one another. — Dallin H. Oaks Copy Share Image
I've learned that no matter how much I care,some people are just assholes. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
“That's us," I said smiling brightly. "The Udells." That seemed to wake Roger up a little, and he blinked at me, surprised.… — Morgan Matson Copy Share Image
“Has something happened to upset you today?” “Yeah, I had an argument with a vacuum cleaner hose, it wanted me to it… — Gillibran Brown Copy Share Image
“She stared down into her coffee, as if she had more to say, but the words had fallen into the mug and… — Rachel Vincent Copy Share Image
Some people say Larry the Cable Guy's only successful because he's pandering to the lowest common denominator, blatantly and not ironically exploiting… — Greg Giraldo Copy Share Image
To me, the best comedians are the ones that take everyday, normal, boring stuff that no one thinks is funny, and they… — Blake Griffin Copy Share Image
We are funny creatures. We don't see the stars as they are, so why do we love them? They are not small… — Saul Bellow Copy Share Image
A young man fills out an application for a job and does well until he gets to the last question, "Who Should… — Milton Berle Copy Share Image
Man is a historical being : The realisations of the powers of human individuals living at any one time takes the cooperation… — John Rawls Copy Share Image
Remove failure as an option and your chances for success become infinitely better. — Joan Lunden Copy Share Image
No matter how old you are, if a little kid shoots you with a toy gun, you pretend to die. — Melania Copy Share Image
The Worst Pain In Life Is When Someone You Know Turns Into Someone You Knew.. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If Tumblr and Twitter were school subjects, my parents would love me. — Jenni Monroe Copy Share Image
It's very funny to see a Justin Bieber song done by a bunch of grown men. — Shawn Stockman Copy Share Image
A day without newspapers is like walking around without your pants on. — Jerry Coleman Copy Share Image
Lets Plan For A Movie 2day R U Free? If Yes.. Tum Apne Tv Pe Dekho, Mein Apne Tv Pe Dekhunga — Mark Copy Share Image
Let us be enraged about injustice, but let us not be destroyed by it. — Bayard Rustin Copy Share Image
If you go to Bed Bath & Beyond without a coupon, people will wonder if you're OK. — John Pinette Copy Share Image
If you cant find the Any key on your laptop to continue try using a hammer a couple of times. — Paul Kityo Copy Share Image
I admit I feel funny when I use the word 'whom' as I'm talking to my diapered children, but I persist. — Faith Salie Copy Share Image
Don't worry if you're single. Godis looking at you right now saying I'm saving this one for someone special. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Isnt it funny, how the sweetest guy in the world can turn into the biggest jerk. — Dev Copy Share Image
“You say very funny things. I am sorry I can't say funny things back. This is not a funny time for me.” — Kurt Vonnegut Copy Share Image
Welcome to my garage! This is where I go to get away from the honey-do list. — Bill Engvall Copy Share Image
One day you are gonna retweet & star me like I retweet & star you, and just like you, I won't care. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
