A tough guy told me, "I'll bet you $10 you're dead." I was afraid to bet him. — Henny Youngman Copy Share Image
Your most intimate relationship is the one you have with your thoughts. — Byron Katie Copy Share Image
You cannot put straight in others what is warped in yourself. — Athanasius of Alexandria Copy Share Image
The new Haitian baseball can't weigh more than four ounces or less than five. — Jerry Coleman Copy Share Image
WIFE, Is in trouble with her roles when her husband finds her a whore in the kitchen and a cook in the… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Pretty friend: I just got 100 likes on my photo ! athletic friend: I just beat everyone in the school at running… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I was first in Sydney in 1993, and have been a few times since then. For someone who didn't know Australia, it… — Colm Toibin Copy Share Image
“There was talk of the Centaur being moved into the elephant cages to make room for a banjo-picking Minotaur. Surrendering his meager… — Don Roff Copy Share Image
Whenever I wanna fall in love with my books.My bed fall in love with me & I always respect the one who… — Abhishek Tiwari Copy Share Image
There is nothing funny about Halloween. This sarcastic festival reflects, rather, an infernal demand for revenge by children on the adult world. — Jean Baudrillard Copy Share Image
I mean, autographs are so funny. I don't think it's good to encourage that sort of thing. Why do people want to… — Hope Sandoval Copy Share Image
Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people. So overweight people are now average. Which means you've met your… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Some of my fans don't really like it when I respond to people who say things that are trying to be hurtful… — Rickie Fowler Copy Share Image
