Hindi / Text Messages

Pashto patriotic poem from a young man of Charsadda: mourning the bombing across Bajaur, Waziristan, and Swat, asking how Eid can still come.

Da Charsadday Zalmii

Che WATAN Matam Matam Vee,
Aow Pa Hr Koor Kii Gham Vee,
Che Barood Vee Da Asmana,
Aow Da Zmakey Lande Bom Vee,
Che Pa Shundo Bus Jara Vee,
Starge Hmm Dhakey Da Nam Vee,
Che Da Gullon Pa Mosam Kii,
Da Golo, Dazo Mosam Vee,
Che Bajaur, Waziristan Ke,
Hmm Pa Swat Ke Muharam Vee,
Nu Za Ba Dasey AKHTAR Sa Kram,
Che Bachi Me Qatal Kiigii,
Mour Aow Plar Me Zobal Kiigii,
Sarr Sajde La Che Tittegii, Pe Bomoona Raw

Liya ek kaghaz aur likha tera naam

A misleading romantic poem about sitting alone, writing your name, and drawing your portrait — that turns out to be a Wanted notice with a cash reward.

Bethay thay teri yaad main tanha ek shaam,
Liya ek kaghaz aur likha tera naam,

Tasvir banai teri aur likha ye pegham,
Zinda pakarnay walay ko 50,000 ka inaam :p

New Qoumi Tarana

A satirical rewrite of Pakistan's national anthem recast as a hymn to Musharraf-era corruption, power cuts, and constitutional manipulation.

Aaeen men ek aur tarmeen,
Ab new quomi tarana

Musharraf sir zameen shad baad,
Kishwar-e-Haseen shad baad,
Tou nishan-e-corruption aalishan,
Arz-e-Musharafstan,
Shad bad opposition sari barbad,
Musharaf sir zameen ka nizam,
atay, gas, bijli ka bohran,
Qoum mulk saltant,
choudhry paindabad,
shad baad,
shukat aziz mulk say farar,
parcham-e-sitara-e-hilal,
Khun main runga sara saal,
Bhol apna mazi shan-e-haal,
khudkash bombar phir hai tayar,
Musharaf hokumat ko aye na zawal

ALLAH aap ko Quaid ki aqal

Funny Pakistan Independence Day dua praying for Quaid's wisdom, Iqbal's looks, Liaquat's coat, Fatima's youth — and Gandhi's hair.

Azadi k din aaj meri dua hai k
ALLAH aap ko Quaid ki aqal,
Iqbal ki shakal, Liaqat ki Shairvani,
Fatima ki jawani, Nehru ki chaal
aur gandhi g k baal day.

JASHAN-E-AZADI MUBARK

Tera dost chor hai kya

Circuit hides his gold chains before an old friend visits — Munna Bhai asks if the friend is a thief, and the real reason is more awkward than that.

CIRCUIT : Bhai, who apnay bachpan ka dost aarehla
aaj raat ko dinner pe. Mera Sara chain collection apnay
kamray mein chupa do na please.

MUNNABHAI : Kyun tera dost chor hai kya?
CIRCUIT : Nahin Bhai, who apnay chain pechan lega.

Sardar-Murghey di tang kithe hai .

A Sardar restaurant joke where the waiter's answers about a chicken's missing body parts become progressively pointed — the last one landing the real insult.

Sardar-Murghey di tang kithe hai .
Waiter-Murga Langda si.
Sardar-Isda dil kithe hai.
Waiter-Murghi lay gai.
Sardar-Isda dimagh kithey hai..
Waiter-Murga sardar si

H¥ppy R¥i±y D¥y D¥

Roman Urdu rain greeting with a mock prayer: may the recipient slip as many times as there are raindrops falling.

Λ/,/ '/, / '/, ; /; / /; /,;'
Happy Rainy Day Dua hai

Barish k Jitnay Qatre giren
utni hi dafa aap slip ho kar giren:p

TO ye EXAMS BAR-BAR KYUN ???

A funny Roman Urdu exam rant pointing out that marriage, love, and death all happen once — so why on earth do exams keep coming back?

Hum jeete EK bar hai,
Marte EK bar hai,
Pyar EK bar hota hai,
Aur shaadi bhi EK hi bar hoti hai..
TO ye EXAMS BAR-BAR KYUN ???

Jannat k 8 darwazay hain

Roman Urdu SMS listing the eight gates of Paradise by name and closing with a dua that each gate may call out the reader's name.

Jannat k 8 darwazay hain,
1.Jannatul mava
2.Darul maqam
3.Darul salam
4.Darul Khuld
5.Jannatul adan
6.Jannatul naim
7.Jannatul Kashif
8.Jannatul firdos

Allah se dua hay k roz-e-qiyamat
her darwazay se
ap ka nam pukara jaye."aameen"

Isi lie to jannat kehte hain

A wife's theological question about why husbands don't get their wives in paradise leads straight to her husband's most comfortable answer yet.

Wife:Suna he k jannat me husband
k sath Wife ko nahi rehne dete
HUSBAND! sahi suna he,
Wife: aisa kion?
Husband: Arey pagli isi liye to
usey jannat kehte hain

Tumsa koi zamin par hua to rab se shikayat hogi

A mock-poetic insult dressed in Urdu verse before landing on the complaint that one person like you was already too many.

Arz kia hay,
Tumsa koi zamin par hua to rab se shikayat hogi,
.
.
.
.
Ek to jhel liya dusra aaya to kayamat hogi.

Tussi Hasde ho sanu hasaan vaaste,

Punjabi verse about the beloved's absolute power: the speaker laughs and cries to match them, yet one sulk would cost the sender everything.

Tussi Hasde ho sanu hasaan vaaste,
tussi rone ho saanu rovaan vaaste,
ek vaar rus ke ta vekho sohneyo,
Marr javange tuhanu manaan vaaste.