Funny Quote by Tommy Cooper Download Open image “I had a ploughman's lunch the other day. He wasn't very happy.” — Tommy Cooper ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ 4.8 out of 5 (6 ratings) Copy quoteShare Funny Humor Inspirational Love Lunch Lunch Day Ploughman Ploughman Lunch Very happy Wasn Happy
“That a ploughman’s turned out to be a rectangular slab of sharp-tasting cheese, a lettuce leaf, an undersized tomato with a thumb-print in it,… — Ross E. Lockhart Copy Share Image
My father was a progressive farmer, and was always ready to lay aside an old plough if he could replace it with one better… — Andrew Taylor Still Copy Share Image
During the first couple of years at school... I used to take my lunch and go down by the old fair grounds & sit… — Frederick Banting Copy Share Image
Back in my school days, when I would scuttle off with a cheese roll, an apple, a box of Sun-Maid raisins and a Penguin… — Rachel Khoo Copy Share Image
“It was Friday, so the farmers' market was in full autumnal swing, a sea of potted chrysanthemums and bushel after bushel of apples, pears,… — Julia Glass Copy Share Image
Once, at Thanksgiving, a neighbor wandered in while my cousin Lisa worked on a turkey, shearing meat off its frame and sliding the steaming… — Jenna Wortham Copy Share Image
“We have had for breakfast, toasts, cakes, a yorkshire pie, a piece of beef about the size and much the shape of my portmanteau,… — Charles Dickens Copy Share Image
There he got out the luncheon-basket and packed a simple meal, in which, remembering the stranger's origin and preferences, he took care to include… — Kenneth Grahame Copy Share Image
I saw a cavalry captain buy vegetable soup on horseback. He carried the whole mess home in his helmet. — Aristophanes Copy Share Image
I went home and took my wife and went to my Cosen Tho. Pepys's and found them just sat down to dinner, which was… — Samuel Pepys Copy Share Image
It doesn't matter how many times the audience has heard it before. If it's funny, it's funny. — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
“Two blondes walk into a building. You'd think at least one of them would have seen it.” — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed,… — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
I inherited a painting and a violin which turned out to be a Rembrandt and a Stradivarius. Unfortunately, Rembrandt made lousy violins and Stradivarius… — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
Last night I dreamed I ate a ten-pound marshmallow, and when I woke up the pillow was gone. — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
I bought some HP sauce the other day. It's costing me 6p a month for the next 2 years. — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
Our ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered with hundreds and thousands. Police say that he topped himself. — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
Gambling has brought our family together. We had to move to a smaller house. — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
And an airplane of spittle dived into the sea, there were no salivas. — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
He said 'I'm going to chop off the bottom of one of your trouser legs and put it in a library. I thought, "That's… — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
My wife said, 'Take me in your arms and whisper something soft and sweet.' I said, 'chocolate fudge.' — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
When you step out and do a song in a musical, the easier thing to do is make it funny. But when those transitions… — Kelli O'Hara Copy Share Image
It's a hard thing to describe. It's just this sense that you got something to say. — Jonah Lehrer Copy Share Image
Sometimes I look at my awesome twitter followers & think to myself, What the hell would I do without them :) — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Congratulations to Facebook on going public with all my private information... — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If you were to send a werewolf to the moon, would he be a werewolf permanently? — Kristen Schaal Copy Share Image
