Quote by Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be used as a spoon—to eat, not cuddle. OK fine, you can use it to cuddle too.
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— Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be used as a pettable non-furry and non-meowing cat.
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— Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be used as man’s best friend, if you covered it in fur and taught it to bark and shit in your…

— Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be covered in black fur, cradled, pet, and called Mr. Fizzlebush. The best part is that since it’ll sit still and…

— Jarod Kintz

“A brick has no legs, so it probably slithers like a snake. Therefore, a brick might make a good pet. And at least you…

— Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be pet, like a dog, and taught to shit in my neighbor's yard.
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— Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be used to prop up a wobbly table—or an unstable relationship. I wish I’d have thought of that before I got…

— Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be used like ice cream. But hold up, hold up. Let me put a bowl under it before you start licking,…

— Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be used to aid the lonely. Carry it with you, converse with it, and if you drink enough, you can even…

— Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be used like a fleeglebeegle, which in turn could be used like a zoopkatofka, which itself could be used like a…

— Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be used to satisfy your hunger—and satisfy my curiosity.
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— Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be used to make music. But why not use something more humane, like your armpit.
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— Jarod Kintz