Skip to content

Cold Quote by Dana Gould

“To really make it look like Santa came, I put reindeer poop on the roof. It's just so cold up there with my pants down.” quote by Dana Gould — Download Open image

“To really make it look like Santa came, I put reindeer poop on the roof. It's just so cold up there with my pants down.”

★ ★ ★ ★ ★ 4.8 out of 5 (6 ratings)

Cold Looks Pants Poop Reindeer Roof Santa

More by Dana Gould

As hard as I try to live with some degree of faith in my life, I just can't believe that the full moon can…

Image

The older I get, the more I look like my favorite shoes.

Image

Somewhere, there's someone who's masturbation ritual ends with them setting up ventriloquist dummies facing the bed. I mean, someone else.

Image

I feel very uncomfortable when I eat in restaurants. I'm obnoxiously polite with the waiters: 'I just want a tuna sandwich. I'll go get…

Image

Cowboy boots with a suit? You're a rough, tough businessman. Chaps with a bow tie? You're in the rough, tough man business.

Image

Despite a primitive brain, the octopus possesses an intricate system that helps it decide which tentacle to masturbate with.

Image

I got mugged about six months ago. The oddest thing about the entire situation, though, was that I wasn't afraid, which is strange because…

Image

I'm the Forrest Gump of comedy.

Image

It's gonna be awesome! A suspected pedophile dunks my kids head in a bucket so when she dies she can live in an invisible…

Image

If I ever go into a coma, one of you has to promise to come by occasionally and tweeze my unibrow.

Image

They say that God is in the details. Then again, they also say that the Devil is in the details. Boy, talk about awkward.

Image

I have one phobia, snakes. And by snakes I mean intimacy.

Image

Explore all 260 Dana Gould quotes

More Cold quotes

Once ye made up yer mind to do somethin', 'tis better t'stumble o'er the small hillock of jump-ahead than t'bash yer head on the…

Image

When you're scared - and I mean really scared, not just hearing a noise in the night, or standing toe to toe with someone…

Alexander Gordon Smith

Image

From the bitter cold winter at Valley Forge, to the mountains of Afghanistan and the deserts of Iraq, our soldiers have courageously answered when…

Image

When I get a chance to play golf or go on a boat with good people, take the boat out and put some lobsters…

Image

Of course Messi could handle a cold Tuesday night in Stoke. He'd be drinking tea and relaxing beforehand. Me? I'd probably be the same.

Image

This cold weather has set all the young Folks to providing Bedfellows. I have signed two or three Licences every Day [as a Fairfax…

Image

When my main character in 'Heat' climbs the tower, the highest diving platform, hoping to resume competitive diving after an injury, I am there…

Image

You start playing when it's cold and you want to be playing when it's cold again.

Image

It would be a piece of ingenuousness to accuse the man of today of his lack of moral code. The accusation would leave him…

Jose Ortega y Gasset

Image

I would have touched it like a child But knew my finger could but have touched Cold stone and water. I grew wild, Even…

William Butler Yeats

Image

What's to become of the morally sound? Left out in the cold, I suppose. We must heal the sick.

Image

When I first started, all the reviews of Cold Chisel would say, 'This singer won't have a voice in six months.'

Image

Browse all 4,972 Cold quotes