Funny, isn't it? The airlines go to all that trouble to keep you from taking a gun on board, then they just… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
The trouble is, you cannot grow just one zucchini. Minutes after you plant a single seed, hundreds of zucchini will barge out… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Many people have trouble sticking to their resolutions, and there is a simple scientific explanation for this. In 1987, a team of… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Why don’t you lift the end?” said Alf. “It’s me back, Alf,” complained Mack. “You know how it troubles me.” “No more… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
I shared this insight with some other boat owners, and they all agreed that, definitely, putting your boar into the water is… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
“Kakimi chertyami oni viigrali holodnuyu voinu?" This translates roughly to: "How the hell did these people win the Cold War?” — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
The obvious and fair solution to the housework problem is to let men do the housework for, say, the next six thousand… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command.… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
You can, legally, possibly hit and kill a fellow golfer with a ball, and there will not be a lot of trouble… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
They have a lot of trouble with pronunciation, because they can't move their jaw muscles, because of malnutrition caused by wisely refusing… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
In my experience, you run into trouble when you ask a group of beer-drinking men to perform any task more complex than… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
This is true; virtually all edible substances, and many automotive products, are now marketed as being low-fat or fat-free. Americans are obsessed with fat… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
This ball was so crowded that it took me - a trained professional journalist with vast experience in this area - forty five minutes… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
The hardest thing about being a guy is that women don't accept that you really are just a simple, pathetic, labrador retriever-like creature. That… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Entire new continent can emerge from the ocean in the time it takes for a Web page to show up on your screen. Contrary… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
The major parties could conduct live human sacrifices on their podiums during prime time, and I doubt that anybody would notice. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
If you look at any list of great modern writers such as Ernest Hemingway, William Faulkner, and F. Scott Fitzgerald, you'll notice two things… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Don't you wish you had a job like mine? All you have to do is think up a certain number of words! Plus, you… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
“Despite the gulf, physical and cultural, between the United States and Japan, both societies are, in the end, made up of people, and people… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Before going on a diet you should consult your doctor, or at least send him some money. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
